Ikebukuro, a haven for all monsters
by Twisteria Lullubee
Summary: Izaya was a god, right? His life was perfect and completely uneffected by petty human problems, even as a child he remained untainted... These were the lies he wanted everyone to believe. She never bought it, because she was everything he claimed to be. She fell in love with the real Izaya, but Izaya couldn't risk accepting love. rape, dubcon, selfharm, izaya/oc light shizuo/oc
1. Chapter 1

HAPPY NEW YEARS!

I don't own Durarara but I do own the the OC in this. This is set just after episode 18, "Out of Your Control"

A new monster

She was dark and mysterious even dressed in white. There was something about her that seemed to separate her from all others around her.

Her dark silhouette scrolled over the concrete as she got off the train when she steps into the light you could see her raven hair and florescent hazel eyes that had an odd glow to them in the light of the moon, her clothes were simple, just a white woman's suit with a red tie. She pulled a folded piece of paper out of her pant's pocket. She opened it and looked it over closely, it was a picture of a fat man with a suit and a mustache. She saw the very man walk by her, she tucked the picture into her pocket and cut off his path.

"Hello," she said, her eyes closing in a manner that many would mistake for innocence, "are you Len Kagame?'

He smiled and adjusted his suspenders, "Why, yes."

Her smile widened but her eyes hardened, out of no where she has a gun in her hand and pulls the trigger. The bullet went straight through his skull with a clean exit wound out the back. The man's body fell backwards as he made a final pathetic sound as he fell dead.

She loomed over the body, her face blank and unfeeling._ Down with a whimper..._

She bared little pity for humans, especially old men. With her silky white gloves untouched by the blood of her sin she put the gun away and stepped over the body as if it weren't there and over to the bullet on the concrete. It had ricocheted off the off the pillars around them, she picked it up and tucked it away in her pocket before going back over to the man's body and pulling out her camera. She laid a rose on his chest before taking a single snap shot and walking away.

The chat-room was buzzing the next day.

_Did you hear about Len Kagame's murder?_ typed out one black haired boy with way too much time on his hands

Yeah, what about it? typed a little boy with a teenage girl for a god.

It just seems to be so strange... I mean who would want to murder a math teacher? typed the boy with too much time.

It was probably a non-discriminative serial killer. s aid a third, a genuine human lover, me.

_But there hasn't been anymore killings. _typed the boy with a teenage god.

_Give it time. _I typed.

_People are calling her the mourning killer. _typed the boy with too much time

Why? I typed.

_When they found the body it had a rose on it, _typed the boy with two much time.

It was at this point the inhuman lady joined the club,_ But one witness said that the murderer was dressed all in white._

_All white... you don't think she was a member of a color gang, do you?_ typed the boy with the teenage god.

_No, it was only one. _typed the boy with too much time.

_So, it is a serial killer... _typed the the boy with a teenage god.

_Only time will tell_. typed the boy with too much time.

_So, who do you think they'll get to replace Len in the high school?_ Typed the boy with a teenage god.

_I don't know yet. _Typed the boy with way too much time on his hands. _I've gotta be going._

_Taro Tanaka has left the chat-room_

_Yeah, _typed the boy with a teenage god_, me too._

_Bakyura has left the chat-room._

_I should go to..._

_Setton has left the chat-room._

_Hmm_ , I typed, _so Ikebukuro has itself a new monster. _

_Kanra has left the chat-room_

_The chat-room is empty._

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><p><strong>I'm not sure that white is what people wear in Japan when they mourn, I'm guessing on this because I know that's what they do in Korea. If I am wrong on this let me know and I'll change it.<strong>

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><p><strong>Please Review<strong>


	2. Chapter 2

Mikado POV

Despite the recent murder, everything was pretty normal seemed pretty normal. No one even seemed to by mourning the man, except, maybe his killer. As horrible as it sounds, I'm actually kind of glad it happened in a way. Me, Masaomi and Anri hadn't been talking at all lately, our lives had become so separate, the death of the teacher served as a distraction from our own troubles and for the first time in almost a month, we actually talked to one another. There was no dollars, yellow scarves, or slasher in our talk, just three teenagers, without a care in the world.

Life moved forward and everyone was anxious to see who the new math teacher was. Masaomi, Anri and I had spent so much time in the hallway just talking we found ourselves running to math that day. Anri still had a tinge of pink on her cheeks from Masaomi's previous comment on her boobs. We made it in just as the bell rang, Masaomi laughed in triumph but I was sure that the teacher was going to count us as late for coming into the classroom like a desert storm. There was one thing I hadn't thought of, the teacher had to be there to punish us.

"What the hell?" said Kida.

"When is this teacher gonna show up?"

Suddenly the door into the classroom opened and out stepped a lean woman, practically swimming in her matronly clothes, her hair pulled up into a messy bun. She looked like she had just got out of bed, even her glasses were skewed. She walked past her desk, practically tripping over her own feet as she made her way over to the chalkboard, she seemed so goofy and uncoordinated, the kind of person who wouldn't hurt a fly, none of us really knew anything yet..

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I got lost," she murmured. She set down her briefcase and picked up a piece of chalk. "My name is Izumi Matsuda," she said, simultaneously writing it down on the chalkboard. The chalk broke at the ""the end of the last character of Matsuda. The class laughed, the women gave an exasperated sigh. "I'm your new math teacher."

"Hellooo, Ms. Matsuda," the class sang, except for Anri and myself.

"There's no need for formalities, call me Izumi." she said with a still slightly stressed expression.

"Hello Izumi," said the class.

"That's better," said Izumi with a smile, "Now does anyone have anything to say before we start?"

"I bet you're really hot under those clothes, Izumi," said Kida, pointing straight at her chest.

I banged his head against my desk, my best friend was acting like an idiot as usual "Is there any girl you won't flirt with?"

"Yeah," said Kida, "an ugly one!"

You could see the discomfort on her face when Izumi gave a shy smile, "I'm flattered, really, but I'm way too old for you."

Kida gave a sly smile, "I'll be the judge of that."

Izumi blushed a little, flustered by Kida's brazenness, "Well, does anyone else have anything they'd like to say, I'm new here, so I don't really know anything about any of you yet."

There was silence so Izumi cleared her throat to end it and began that day's lesson. I kinda felt sorry for her, she was more of a push over then a lot of the subs I'd seen in the past. Masaomi seemed happy though, smiling as he said, "This is going to be fun, right my boobilishious Anri?" in a loud voice that would have brought shame to any other human being, wrapping his arm around Anri.

Anri flushed and didn't answer. My flush was much darker.

"Wh-why do you say things like that?" I stammered out.

Kida answered only with a shameless grin. My flush remained for a while, then, I smiled to myself.

As humiliating as it was, it was nice to have things back to normal. It was then when I realized that this was normal, this was life. Something I'd deprived myself of for a long time, maybe change is overrated.

The young teacher came out after all the students were gone, sighing in more then obvious relief as she went of for her own lunch break. This would be the first time in almost a month I'd be with my friends during mind. Despite our different paths, the same sound stopped us both.

_Crying. _Someone was crying their eyes out in the girl's bathroom.

I'm not like Masaomi, I wasn't about to go into the girl's bathroom; however, being a girl herself, Izumi was greeted by no such issue. She tucked her lunch container into her shoulder bag and went in. She left the door open.

_One peek can't hurt._

I'd like to repeat, I am not like Masaomi, I just wanted to know why the girl was crying.

As I looked inside I heard Kida call.

"Mikado, aren't you gonna join us?" he said.

"I'll catch up," I said, hoping to leave it there.

Then to my horror, he noticed I was looking into the girl's room, he gave his signature Cheshire-cat grin, "Oh, Mikado, you sly dog, peeking into the girl's bathroom?"

"I'm not-"

"Oh, well, have fun, we won't wait up." he interrupted, walking away.

"I wasn't peeping," I said, but quietly so neither Izumi nor the girl would hear me. I watched as she went slowly over to a girl that had just returned from home covered in bruises sloppily covering them up with makeup in the mirror.

She recognized the girl from her math class, "You okay?" she asked.

The girl jumped up, "Don't look at me!"

Izumi came closer, "Who did that to you?" she asked, her voice clear and confident, totally unlike the flustered young teacher we'd seen in math class, placing her left hand on the girl's shoulder.

"No-no one, I fell." she stammered out.

"Don't lie to me."

"He loves me..." she whispered under her breath.

"Was it your boyfriend?" asked Izumi.

She shook her head, "He would never let me have one..."

Izumi's face softened, "You're father?"

No reaction, that was the only answer she needed.

"Did you fight back?"

No answer, just tears and a shaky, "He loves me.."

"If he loved you he wouldn't hit you. Trust me, guys say that all the time, they never mean it. You can't rely on anyone else but you. If you start to rely on a guy for anything he'll only cut you up and leave you for dead."

"He's different..." she said forcefully.

Izumi decided to go with a gentler approach so she wouldn't scare her off, "Well, what if I could show you how to restrain him when he get's like that, without hurting him?"

The girl looked up, a small spark of hope in her eyes, "You could really do that?"

"Yes, I could. We'll start tomorrow during lunch." said Izumi.

The girl nodded in agreement, "Thank you."

"What's your name?" asked Izumi.

"My name is Sake."

"Nice to meet you Sake, I'll see you tomorrow." and with that, she left the bathroom. So she was kind after all, not just clumsy, but harsher then I had expected. There was much more to Izumi Matsuda then met the eye, and I hadn't even seen half of it yet.


	3. Chapter 3

OC POV

I came home late after my first day as math teacher, my little black cat greeting me as usual at the door, I slid the tip of my foot under him and moved him aside so I could come in.

"It worked, Izaya," I said to my cat, if he wasn't here I would have just have spoken to myself, so it wasn't as creepy as it seemed, "I was made the new math teacher at the high school, it's a shame I about that Len guy though...but no one seems to be mourning him though." I pulled my hair out of it's bun so it fell to my shoulders, "I didn't really think they would, I looked into that guy, no family, no friends, stuck up and married to his work. He didn't have much to live for anyway."

I pulled off my dirty black suit jacket and pulled on a clean white one, "Oh, and speaking of mourning have you heard what there calling me now?"

Izaya just meowed at me, looking up at me with those attentive green eyes, rubbing his head against my leg, try getting that from a man.

"That's right, 'the mourning killer' kind of dark for me, don't you think? I just wanted to have him rest in peace." I pulled on a pare of white pants and moved my glasses into their proper position.

"But, whatever, it's better to be feared then loved any day isn't it, Izaya?" I gave my cat a longing stroke before grabbing a tube of lipstick, "And speaking of love and fear, I think now that I'm in Ikebukuro I should say 'hi' to your name sake." I put some bright red lipstick on my lips.

I took one look at myself in the mirror and a dark smile came to my face, "I wonder if he'll be happy to see me."

A certain information broker was skipping the streets of Ikebukuro late into the night. I'd heard it wasn't unusual for him to do things like that these days, it was probably just fun to him. He was in for a nasty surprise tonight. He heard a rustle in the bushes and shrugged it off, he heard more sounds from behind him and pulled out his switchblade, "Who's there?" he swung around to be greeted by a person in a black body suit on a motorcycle, "Oh, Celty, what are you doing up at this hour?"

The person, presumably Celty, pulled out her cell phone and began to type something. I could only just see it from the bush I was hiding in.

_[I could ask you the same thing, there's a killer on the loose you know.]_

Izaya laughed, "As touching as your concern is, Celty, I'm perfectly capable of protecting myself against any killer, mourning or not," he said smugly, his hands on his hips, "now what are you doing out here?'

_[Like I said, there's a killer on the loose, and for some reason, Shinra's really worried. So I'm trying to find her.]_

Shinra, I knew a Shinra once... but that wasn't on my mind right now. The chick was never gonna find me.

"Well, obviously, she's no where around here so go look somewhere else." said Izaya, little did he know.

_[Fine, but you should be careful if you know what's good for you. She managed to kill someone without leaving a bit of evidence.]_

Izaya laughed again, "Hardly, she was seen."

_[Ever think that that's what she wanted?]_

Izaya laughed even harder this time, "Your really paranoid."

Celty typed nothing more, but I could tell that she was sighing inside as she rode away.

Finally, Izaya was all alone.

I fallowed him all the way to a private parking complex, when he was finally truly away from everyone, before making myself known.

"Hey, babe, whatchya' doing all alone on such a lovely night?" I said, still keeping myself concealed in the shadows.

"I don't know who you are, but I don't give it up for any girl, so go away." he said, smug as usual, running his fingers through his hair.

I grinned and stepped out of the shadow, "You've given it up for me before."

Izaya stepped backwards, all his smugness replaced by fear and shock, "I-Izumi?"

I nodded.

"B-but you're dead! You can't be her!" he shouted, his back bumping into a concrete support.

"Oh, but I am, I survived, no thanks to you," I said.

"You can't! It's not possible! You're only human! No human could have survived that!" Izaya was desperate and scared, pressed up as far away from me as possible when against the support without turning his back to me.

"'Only human', huh?" I started to mock, "Could just any human hold the great Izaya down and-"

"Shut up! I didn't know how to defend myself back then!" Izaya shouted defensively but still scared.

"Aw, is Izaya gonna have a little tantrum?" I teased.

Izaya took a deep breath, trying to compose himself at this point, "Who cares if you survived," he said softly, I looked at him curiously, he pulled his knife out from his pocket, "I just means I get to kill you again!" he laughed derangely as he drug his knife across my chest again and again.

He stopped after a few minutes and I stood there, clutching my chest. To a normal person, Izaya's slicing would have been excessive, however, when I moved my hands my body was unscathed.

"You're going to have to do better then that, baby." I pounced on him, he avoided and darted away screaming, "Dammit! Dammit!" at the top of his lungs. I ran in pursuit.

Izaya ran as fast as his legs could carry him, stopping only occasionally to try and slice me again, it was official, my shirt was ruined, but he never cut through my skin.

"Dammit! Why can't I cut her? She came back from the dead and now she can't die? THIS IS RIDICULOUS!" he screamed, he was always so cute when he was frustrated.

I laughed and ran faster to catch up with him, I hadn't been running at my full speed, that would ruin the fun of the chase. As I got closer he tried to cut me with his switchblade again, I kicked it out of his hand and grabbed it out of the mid air as Izaya fell to the ground. Before he had had a chance to try and run away again and grabbed the sides of his head and pulled him into a forceful kiss, jerking his head back roughly, forcing my tongue into his mouth. He fought back weakly trying to pull his head away, the tinge of chloroform in my lipstick put an end to that. I wasn't enough to make him pass out, but it was enough to keep him from thinking straight enough to really fight. I broke the kiss gently and pulled out Izaya's switchblade, causing Izaya to shake.

""Don't worry, Izaya, I'm not gonna kill you. I just wanna have a little fun is all." I ran the blade over waist band and began to drag it over one of his legs, cutting straight threw the fabric of his pants and underwear in a playfully slow motion, then repeated the process with the other leg. Izaya just lay there, trembling, covered only by the little bit of pants that laid over his privates like a loincloth. I stoked up and down his bare legs.

"It's been such a long time, I never forgot you, not even for a moment. Every night I pictured you under me, just like this. I know you haven't forgotten me." I kissed his cheek, he shivered. I had always had the ability to read his emotions like a book. I knew what he was afraid of, liking it.

"St-stop..." he said, his eyes cloudy with fear and the drug I gave him.

I smiled, "Are you going to beg me to?"

"N-no.."

"Let's see if we can't change your tune," I slid my hand under the remnants of his pants, making his breath hitch. I knew I was being cruel, but I wanted to hear him beg, for more or less, I wanted him to remember which one of us had always had the control.

"D-don't touch that!" he said.

"Why not? Last time I checked it was mine."

Izaya gave a breathy, scared chuckle, "So you have a dick, huh? Can't say I'm surprised."

"You are mine," I reminded, breathing the words against his lips, "You were always mine. Your running away from me doesn't change that." I leaned even closer. One more kiss would be enough for someone of Izaya's lithe stature to fall unconscious. He closed his eyes, knowing what would happen to him after he was out.

Then out of now where, I had a tire against the side of my head! It was Celty. She popped a wheely on her bike and rammed it against my head, causing my face to crush into the concrete supports. She let the wheel spin.

Izaya stood up, his laughter near hysteric, "Serves you right! I'll see you in hell!"

Maybe someday, Izaya, but not today.

I grabbed the wheel in my right hand, stopping it's spinning instantly. Celty gasped, holding the wheel in one hand I threw the whole bike over the side, taking Celty with it.

I turned to Izaya, there was no blood on my body, he had only succeeded in messing up my hair, "That really wasn't okay, Izaya, that could have really hurt me. I'm not going to let that slide."

Izaya just stared at me, his eyes wide and his jaw slack, "Not even Shizu-chan could have.." he looked dizzy, afraid, whether it was from the drug already in his system or merely shock and fear he wobbled on his legs. When he fell, I caught him.

"You're so beautiful when your tired," I kissed his neck, then gave little bite, just enough to leave a lasting mark, he whimpered, "Maybe you should get a little rest, hmm?" I lowered my lips onto his but stopped just as they touched, "Don't ever cross me like that again, your mine. I know where you live. Ikebukuro has itself a new master, and you have an old one, understand?"

Izaya nodded gently, I laid him back down on the concrete. With that I walked away, glancing back at him.

No matter what you felt for someone, it's better to be feared the loved, because love lies. The only truth is in fear.

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><p>Please Review or I'll nothing bad will ever happen to Izaya again.<p> 


	4. Chapter 4

Izaya POV

I thought she was dead, she should have died...

Ikebukuro's new monster was my nightmare.

I had passed out on the concrete after she left me and was awoken by the sun on my face, did she ever think things through? I could have been attacked by a gang or killed by Shizu-chan, then what good would I be to her? I thought and mentally slapped myself. I was already thinking of myself along _those _lines again, as an object for others to play with.

I don't know how long I just laid there, re-capping the events of last night. Her sneaking up on me, chasing me, touching me- let's stop there.

With that decision I stood up, the muscles in my back tightening up from **sleeping on the concrete! **

I rubbed my back with one hand while using the other to hold up the shredded remnants of my pants, cursing. I was in the middle of fucking Ikebukuro, with no pants.

_Fucking Shit._

I ran all the way back to my building, holding my pants together. Despite all the time I had taken to calm myself I was trembling the hardest I had in years... I'd worked so hard to come off to everyone as nonchalant about everything, but my facade was completely dissolved and everyone was staring as I bolted down the streets. The only thing that could make this worse was Shizu-chan.

Thank heaven he didn't seem to be out today.

I had all the reason in the world to tremble, the only person who could disintegrate my every mask and plan was back in my life.

Why does the world hate me? No matter what I've done no one deserves the kind of torture Izumi Chang was capable of. I fumbled at the door into my apartment, trying to unlock the door and together my pants at the same time was difficult. I went in the moment I got the key to turn and sighed with relief as it locked behind me.

Namie greeted me at the door, "Where the hell have you been?" she looked me over, "And what the hell happened to your pants?"

"Nothing, I'm going into my office." I ran past her before she had the time for further questions and into my office. I looked at myself in the mirror. My hair was messy from laying on the concrete, my pants where in poor condition, and there was a tinge of red on my lips from when she kissed me. _She kissed me, _I shuddered at the thought. Honestly I looked like I'd had a pretty good lay.

With that thought I mentally screamed.

I let go of the edge of my pants, leaving the fabric to fall to the floor, baring my lower half, I shuddered again at exactly how easy it was for her to do this. She attacked me and I couldn't do anything about it, she knew exactly where I was last night.. And I don't know anything about her at this point. Could she even have been telling the truth when she said she knew where I lived? She could be watching me right now. I ran over to my dresser and grabbed a pair of jeans and pulled them on both legs at a time. I just didn't want to be exposed anymore. God, she knew everything there was to know about me, my whole past. If Shizu-chan ever heard about this... Dammit! This was going to ruin everything. All my plans, she would ruin them all, I was dead. I plopped down in my seat and tried to gather myself, wiping the sweat of my forehead. I hadn't even realized I was sweating...

Namie, obviously loosing her patience walked into my office.

"What the hell is going on? Where were you last night? Who were you with? What poor innocent did you molest? I'm gonna hear another news story about a chick jumping off of a roof top-"

My laugh held a strong tinge of delirium, fucking nerves, "I didn't molest anyone, Namie-san, I just went out last night and got drunk, thought it'd be funny to cut off my pants on the freeway, some guy punched me and I passed out on the pavement." I lied through my teeth, my body betraying me as I shook again. Lying about it only brought it up in my thoughts again.

As oblivious as Namie was even she picked up my odd behavior, her expression was an odd mix of frustration, confusion and maybe even an undertone of concern, "You were attacked? Did he do something to you while you were out, or something? You're acting even more off then usual."

"I guess I'm just hung over," I forced a drunken sounding giggle, "Why are you so loud? Why is the sun so bright?" I laid my arm over my eyes, my acting was truly off, but it was good enough for Namie.

She sighed, annoyed with me, "You're a real idiot, you know that, right?" she muttered heading out the door, "Coming to the office fucking hungover, what's next?"

I laid back into my chair, tasting bile as my stomach threatened to lose it's contents... Suddenly I heard a sound and practically jumped out of my skin... It was Namie, going into the elevator in the other room. I threw my hand against my forehead and laughed at myself for being so ridiculous... my laughter was hysteric and uncontrollable. Somewhere in the back of my mind I kept telling myself to to get back together but I couldn't stop. Slowly a hiccuped sob worked it's way into my laughter.

I didn't even know I was crying until I felt tears trickle down my chest.

I was sobbing and laughing at the same time now, and I was on the verge of hyperventilation.

When I did manage to calm I just stared up at the ceiling fan as it turned... Remembering so much of my past, of her... She was the story book villain of my past, the memory hurt so much...

_Her hand encircled my waist, stroking my bare midriff, she put her chin onto my shoulder and whispered into my ear, "What do you want most in the world?" it was a question she asked every night._

To be away from you, _was my only thought...it was half sarcastic at that point._

_She grinned and kissed nipped my earlobe, "I don't think so, Izaya-kun, you like it." she pulled me deeper into her lap, running her fingers gently through my hair._

"_Wh-what are you talking about, I didn't even say-" I started to say._

_She laughed, "You want to be away from me, or at least, so you think." she pressed a kiss onto my neck._

_Back then, I still joked with her, and meant it, she was my 'frenemie'._

"_So you can read minds now?" I joked, subconsciously leaning back into her ministrations._

"_I always could read minds, but yours is the most interesting. Why do you think I hate people so much?" she slowed her ministrations a little then..._

"_So you picked me out of all the people.." I said, chuckling, "We're nothing alike you know, I love humans."_

"_But you hate me," she said, a tinge of sarcasm in her voice._

"_I don't really hate you-" I didn't even know why I was arguing, she kissed me then, deeply._

_All the jokes were gone at that moment, I was kissing back and in the heat of the moment the shame never registered. She broke the kiss, a triumphant smile on her face._

"I know you don't, and you don't want to leave me either," she kissed me again, this one equally as heated as the one before it.

_She broke the kiss and I giggled, it was almost as hysteric as those of the present, "Maybe your right, if I didn't have you who would I tease everyday?" _

"_That's not the only reason," she kissed my forehead, and pulled down my pants._

"_Don't-" I was cut off by a kiss, by hands on my chest pushing me onto my back, her mouth slipped from mine and to my boxers kissing me through them. I moaned._

"_Just say no and I'll stop..." she kissed me again._

_I couldn't even speak, but this was her game, and I was her toy, The word "no" never passed through my lips even as I regained my speech and she moved on top of me, "So," I said in a breathy voice, "since you can read minds you already know __**my**_ _answer, so how about you t-tell me yours," I panted, "what do you want most in the world?"_

_No answer just a smile and a kiss, "You'll never know."_

She took me over and over again, and I fucking let her... I hated it! I hated her... She made me so weak then, and she was doing it all over again. I could feel each kiss as I remembered it on my skin, sweat beaded on my face as I watched the ceiling fan turn... She was back, I hated it all so much, I hated how hard thoughts of her were getting me... I was whore then and she could bring me back to that.. That helplessness when I couldn't even control my own body. I tried to kill her so many times but I dropped the knife, and when I finally...

She was back. It was over for me, I couldn't stop her. She was going to kill me.. she was going to-to-

My stomach made good on it's threat.

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><p>Please review! :)<p> 


	5. Chapter 5

Celty POV

I didn't see the whole fight, in fact all I really saw was Izaya on the ground, a woman in white sitting up on his hips, holding a knife. For a moment I thought Izaya was just using an innocent, ( I wouldn't put it past him) until I saw the knife in her hand and his terrified expression.

Woman. White. Knife. I gasped.

_The mourning killer. _I may not like Izaya, but I would never be able to live with myself if I let that murderer get away. I rushed back to them at my bike's top speed, popping a wheely at the moment and slamming the woman into one of the concrete supports. It was a thing I'd done a thousand times in fights against cops and human traffickers.

_Izaya stood up, his laughter near hysteric, "Serves you right! I'll see you in hell!"_

I looked over at him, his pants were cut down the legs, she'd obviously had him long enough to do damage. It got to the point I wasn't even thinking about the woman under my tire.I subconsciously figured she was unconscious by now, until...

My wheel stopped turning, she was holding it. I looked at her, shocked, into her eyes for a split second. Her face was strictly Japanese, but her eyes were an inhuman blue, there was murder in them as she threw my bike over the side of the turn pike, with myself still on it.

I panicked for only a split second as the wind rushed past me and the earth got steadily closer, I pulled myself back onto my falling bike and released shadows to cushion the fall to the road below. The landing was still rough, however, the tires screeching out in protest as my barrier faded and rubber met road.

I looked back up at the parking complex at least twenty stories up from the road I had landed on, my mind was racing.

_What-what was that? _I wondered. If she could stop me so easily... then there was nothing I would be no more useful in stopping her then I would be stopping Shizuo. Well, now that Izaya was up I was sure that he would be fine, he would just pull a miraculous escape like he always does.

I shook my (head) helmet to calm myself down and started back off to Shinra's, he needed to know what I had learned... The mourning killer... wasn't human.

I didn't get home until early the next morning, I nearly crashed three times, it seemed my bike was having as much of a problem recovering from the shock.

The moment Shinra opened the door I ran into his arms at full force, knocking him backwards, still shaken.

He wrapped his arms around me loosely returning an embrace that I knew was probably too hard.

"You've never embraced my like this before—not that I'm complaining, but is there something you want to tell me?" he said.

He was such an idiot, but I loved him for it.

Pulling my arms out from under him I sat up on his waist, pulled out my PDA and began typing on it.

Shinra smiled, "Slow down, Celty, you're rambling.."

I took a deep breath, _[I found the mourning killer,]_

Shinra sat up under, "That's fantastic!"

_[No, Shinra, it's really not]_

Shinra's smile faded instantly, "What do you mean?"

_[I found her in a parking complex, she was after Izaya, I don't know why.]_

"_Is Izaya okay?" asked Shinra._

_[Pfft, of course he is, he takes on Shizuo all the time and comes back without a bruise.]_

"_Yes, but Shizuo acts completely out of instinct and anger, he's not a methodical, cold-blooded murderer," remarked Shinra._

_[That sounds more like Izaya.]_

Shinra made a small sound of neither agreement or disagreement, "Well, continue telling me what happened."

_[When I ran into them she had him cornered, so I did the natural thing. I popped a wheely on my bike and slammed her into a support.]_

"_So she's out now?" said Shinra._

_[No, she's not.]_

"_But how-"_

_[She grabbed the wheel as it was turning and threw me over the side. I saw her! She wasn't even bruised.] _I paused then, staring down at Shinra, _[Shinra, I don't think she was human.]_

For a moment, I didn't think that Shinra had read the words I had typed out.

"What do you think she is?" he whispered.

_[I don't know, but I've never been so scared in my life.]_

"_Celty," Shinra said, sitting up fully, "did you see Izaya-kun get away?" he slid out from under me and went to get his coat._

I stood up also, _[No, but I'm sure he's alright, he's always alright.]_

Shinra pulled on his coat, "I'm sure you're right, but it can't hurt to check up on him," I put on my helmet as Shinra pulled on his gloves, "I am his doctor after all."

The trip to Izaya's office building was shorter then I remembered, I just kept recapping those moments.

I looked back at the man with his arms around my waist. Shinra seemed so worried.. Could he be right? Could I really have left Izaya there to be killed or worse... I was so scared I wasn't even thinking... No, he was okay.

We arrived just as his assistant was walking out, muttering to herself as she got into her car for what I hoped was her lunch break. Both myself and Shinra ran into the elevator as fast as our legs could carry us and we both must have pushed the 'up' button at least five times. As soon as we got up to the floor with Izaya's own office we ran out and started looking around.

He went over to the door into his personal office and knocked, "Izaya?" Shinra said, "Are you in?"

"Yes..." Izaya's voice came through the door, a bit hoarse and hesitant.

"It's Shinra and Celty, can we come in?" said Shinra.

"I- err- ummm, give me a minute and I'll come out, okay?" the voice came again, still hoarse but rushed now.

I stood beside Shinra, waiting for him to come out. I heard water running, fabric hitting the ground and violent scrubbing.

Shinra said what we both were thinking, "Is he taking a shower in there?"

Izaya came out, dressed in pale blue jeans and instead of his usual black v-neck, he wore a grey turtle neck under his fur trimmed jacket, his hair slightly damp as if recently washed, a weak smile on his lips, "Hello," he seemed to want to say more but that was all that came out.

"Celty told me what happened last night,"said Shinra, for a second, Izaya's smile broke, "you were attacked, are you alright?"

Izaya threw his head back and laughed, "I get attacked all the time by Shizu-chan, and this is the first time you've ever bothered to ask if I'm okay after a fight?"

"You've never been pinned down by Shizuo," said Shinra, adjusting his glasses.

Izaya swallowed, seeming to be trying to choose he next come back, I'd never seen him like this, he seemed almost scared. Shinra seemed to sense it also, normally he addressed him with all smiles and high energy, but today he was calm and solemn. Like he was trying to calm some sort of frightened animal.

Izaya put his hands on his hips, "Yeah, but this was a _girl, _a weak, fragile little girl."

This was the point that I jumped into the conversation, _[Weak? Fragile! Are you insane? I rammed her head into a wall and she walked away from it.]_

Izaya laughed again, he was laughing way too much for a single one of them to be genuine, "Not for long, she ran off right after that."

Shinra tilted his head, "But that doesn't even make any sense," he said, "why would she run off if she already had yo-"

Izaya raised his hand in a stop motion, "Don't ask me to make sense of the insane, that's the job of the insane, like you." he said with a smug smirk.

I will not allow anyone to insult Shinra, I grabbed one of his wrist and then the other, pinning them above his head and pressing his back to the wall.

I hated how superior he always acted, like a god, like everyone else was just one of his pawns like he was invincible-

"_Please l-let m-me g-go," the superior begged, trying to make himself as small as possible, his eyes shut tightly, "I-I won't ru-run off... I swear. Jus-just don't touch me..." _

I was shocked, Shinra put his hand on my shoulder, "Celty... let him down." he said. I released Izaya's wrists and he slid to the floor, shaking.

Shinra offered him his hand, "Izaya-kun, are you sure you're alright?"

Izaya batted Shinra's hand away angrily, choosing instead to use the wall as support as he got up, "I'd be a hell of a lot better if your psychotic girlfriend kept her hands off of me," he said glaring at me like I'd just killed his dog.

Wait a second... since when did Izaya care if I threatened him?

_[Izaya, what happened last night after she flung me off the building?] _I typed.

"I already told you, she ran off." Izaya repeated, "besides, why do you care anyways?"

Neither of us could really think of a good answer.

Izaya smiled without mirth, "That's what I thought, as fun as it always is to be a subject of one of your experiments, Shinra, I actually have work to do." his voice was breaking, if I didn't know better I'd say he was on the verge of tears.

"Izaya, tell us what's wrong!" Shinra yelled.

Izaya giggled, "Same thing as always, I'm surrounded by fools and monsters." he went back into his own office closing the door behind him.

_I wasn't how long we just stood there, registering everything that had just happened. Izaya would never admit it, but he had just begged not to be touched, lied through his teeth, and almost cried..._

I didn't know of what yet, or even why, but Orihara Izaya was terrified.

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><p><strong>Poor Izaya, but he's cute when he's scared. ;) Please Review<strong>


	6. Chapter 6

**Sorry it's not as long as I hoped it would be... Changing POVs in each chapter proved to be problematic to making them long... The next chapter will be Izaya POV.**

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><p>Izumi POV<p>

I pulled my soft, black cotton sheets off of my refreshed body, "Good morning, Izaya," I smiled softly, moving close to him and petting his head. He returned that touch with a slow blink of realization and a soft meow before stretching and jumping out of bed. He paused and yowled in protest when I didn't immediately fallow him. I giggled softly and got out of bed, my sheer white bedclothes chilled slightly in the cool air of my apartment.

The night I pinned my cat's name sake down and kissed him, I slept incredibly well, I doubt he did. I debated with myself for a while on whether to take him home with me or simply leave him there, I opted to leave him there. He would be fine, and if anyone did touch him, I would tear their heart out. No one is allowed to threaten what is already mine. I thought with a scowl as I poured food into my cat's empty dish.

No one is allowed to torture Izaya but me.

_I've earned it... _that thought brought a little sadness and regret, I steeled myself in a second. I was doing to him what he did to me, I needed to forget my emotion for a while if I wanted this to work.

I go by Izumi Matsuda, but my real name is Izumi Chang... I made the change years ago for I no longer had the right nor the desire to go by that name, I made the change after I lost Izaya... I live in a large, well large by Japan's standards, four room apartment with my own bathroom...Their are simple reasons that using a public bath house wouldn't work well for me. The other three rooms are the bedroom, kitchen/dining room and the living room. I develop my photos in my closet, which is why my laundry has taken up occupancy on my bedroom floor for the time being. From the pile of folded "clean" laundry I pulled a button down shirt and a plain pair of black pants. I didn't bother making myself look put together, I wasn't _supposed _to be, Matsuda was a character I invented to hide my past from prying eyes. I put up my hair in a perfect bun and then pulled some hair out to give it that slept-in look, pulled on my shoes, laid out extra food for Izaya and I was off for high-school.

_Ungh, I dropped out of school for a reason.. _

I took the walk to the high-school slowly even though I knew I was probably going to be late, that was a part of my character also. She had horrible timing, and nothing was going to make me forget myself, except..

There was Sake. Seeing her crying brought out my protective nature. I mentally face-palmed, what the hell was I thinking! It was protective nature that had always gotten me into trouble, but... Sake seemed innocent enough. What can I say, I'm a softy for victims of abuse.

I pulled up my sleeve and read a few of the scars on my arm, _love, blood, death, _despite the wear of time the characters were so cleanly carved into the top layer of flesh in my left arm I could read them as clearly as the days I cut them in.

Sometimes, I was such a softy for victims of abuse I let them abuse me.

That's one of the many reasons I avoid public bath houses.

When I was close enough to see the school I sprinted the rest of the way so I could come in genuinely breathless. Exactly as I came into the building the bell to my class period rang, I'd like to point out that I live over ten miles away from the school.

I had picked up the names of most of my students easily, Anri, Mika, Masaomi, Seji, Mikado and of course, Sake. I've always been good with faces, and at studying expressions. I had already learned so much about them all... Mika was obsessed with Seji, and though he tolerated her her love was obviously wasn't returned. Both Mikado and Masaomi were in love with Anri, despite there different ways of expressing it, but Anri always seemed like her mind was somewhere else. Like she knew what was going on, but like in the end none of it had anything to do with her. Sake had been abused, by someone she thought would protect her, that was written all over her face, whether I was looking for it or not.

I had an interesting class to say the least.

Math was a boring subject, it had never been favorite to study. But a psychology teacher would have given me away... That and the psychology teacher had three daughters. But I taught my class like a good teacher, and had enough of a understanding in the subject in order to do it well.

My entire class was dull, but I was good at faking that I was satisfied. God, Matsuda was a boring woman...

At least I had lunch to look forward to. Sake and I met in the school courtyard.

Now, all I had to think of was how the hell to do this without showing that I could actually fight.

"I came," Sake said softly, rubbing her arm.

"I noticed," I said with a smile, she lowered her head and flushed.

"Do you really think you can help me?"

I nodded, "I'm not much of a fighter myself but I took some self-defense classes when I was a teenager," that worked well enough, "I can teach you some."

She raised her head then, "Like what?"

I blinked, startled by the sudden change of character, but I found the whole thing more than slightly amusing, so it was easy to let go.

I smiled, "Well, let's start, when someone comes after you what do you do?"

I taught her the basics of using self-defense, or at least as much as possible without revealing my identity... When we were finished she hugged me. I did my my best not to flinch at the natural display of human affection.

I was a blood thirsty murderer... a molester... a monster... what did she want from me enough to do this?

Wasn't I already giving her everything that she wanted? I had nothing else to offer her as payment for this... Didn't she understand that? I had no way of paying for this...

"Sake," I said softly, "let me go, I don't have anything to give you..." I gently pushed her hands off of me.

I could feel her eyes on me as I began to walk away, "What?" she whispered.

She didn't understand... of course she didn't understand... she was still innocent, she was still human.

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><p><strong>So, Izaya (the guy) wasn't in this chapter, but if you pay attention you can get some hints to the dynamic of his and Izumi's relationship... Mostly in the last part.<strong>

**This is a wierd chapter, I know... Review?**


	7. Chapter 7

Izaya POV

I'd receded into my apartment ever since Shinra and Celty had come and visited... I broke down right in front of them... They would tell others, questions would be raised and I would wind up back where I had started. I shivered at the thought. I didn't sleep, I didn't eat, any food I swallowed came right back up and any time I slept I would have nightmares.

I was even more sad and pathetic then the humans I'd spent months watching fall apart. The biggest thing was that, for them it took months, it had been less then a week since I saw Izumi again.

I needed a way out of this depression... I saw the wine cooler I had left out for my clients. I myself never drank, for I wanted to remain cold sober and in control of myself at all times. But things were very different now, I had already lost control of myself. It was Izumi that now controlled my every action, even if not in person the memories of her were enough. I would merely be handing over her control over me to the alcohol. At least the alcohol had no interest in getting in my pants.

So I chose the alcohol, in retrospect, it was a very bad idea...

A couple hours later, I stumbled out into the sunlight, it hurt my eyes. For the first time, I felt good, I laughed, despite the pain.

I was going to kill Izumi, I decided... I was going to kill her and keep her body in a cooler so she couldn't come back.

I stumbled around, knife drawn. Not even realizing he stares from my beloved humans. I looked like I had gotten dressed in the dark, I was wearing two different shoes, and everything else on my body was skewed in one direction on the other. I skipped all the way to Ikebukuro, laughing all the way. I bumped into people left and right and even into a metal lamp post once, I asked it to excuse me.

I was being far from inconspicuous in my travel, I probably cut a few of the people I bumped into with my knife.

In my drunken state, I seemed to have forgotten the amount of enemies I had actually made in Ikebukuro other then my belov- Izumi. She was the only thing I had on my mind, I had forgotten all about the yellow scarves or Shizu-chan. I never ran into Shizu-chan that fateful day, however when it came to the yellow scarves, I wasn't that lucky.

I had scarcely taken a step inside of Ikebukuro before I had run into some of the gangs older members.

"What the hell are you doing on our turf?" one of them asked.

I laughed and draped my arms around his neck, "Don't you know who I am?"

"What the hell? Are you some kinda' fag? Get the hell off of me!" he said, getting his arms under mine in attempt to pry me off.

I giggled and held on like a viper, his annoyance amused me, "Don't act like you don't like it."

"I said, GET THE HELL OFF!" he threw me to the ground. My head hit the concrete wall behind me and even in that state I was sure I could feel the warm trickle of blood on my neck.

They were mad now as the approached me, I curled up and smiled at them like a child that knew it had just done something wrong.

"You fucking little fag, I oughtta-" the largest said.

I knew that being drunk made me such a slut before I put the first glass to my lips, I didn't care at the time... I didn't realize that this would happen.

"We oughtta fuck you raw right here in this alley but you'd like that too much, wouldn't you?" another said before kicking me in the stomach.

I reeled over and puked on his pant leg.

"You little shit!" He grabbed me by my hair and gave my body a violent shake. I whimpered, no jokes, the pain was real, even if what I was seeing before me wasn't.

Instead of a harmless thug, I saw a monster of a man in a black pin-striped suit, obese with a shiny bald head.. His fat sausage fingers I my hair as he shook me...

"_You worthless piece of shit! I took you in, cared for you! And you have the nerve to fight me? There's no wonder your own parents didn't even care about you! Your a disobedient little brat!"_ I whimpered and sobbed, desperately trying to get him to just let me go, I surrendered trying to cover my naked body to reach at his hand,_"I should throw you out on the streets! Stand there and watch as some homeless person pulled his filthy dick out of the wall and then stuck it in you! Is that what you want?"_

I whimpered and shook my head to the monster in my memory, but it was the thug in the alley that saw it, "N-no, please... I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" I shouted.

The thug stopped shaking me, "What the hell?" he looked over at his buddies, who shrugged, apparently just as confused about the situation as he was.

"What the hell should we do with the little fucker?" the smallest asked.

Now that he'd finally stopped shaking me, I had just about come to my senses, (as much as a drunken person can) the first thing I did was look down at my thighs, they were fully covered. And the man holding onto my head was just a funny little human... Far form the monster I pictured.

I watched them talking about me... With me right there...

Nothing I wasn't used to.

"Maybe we should just leave him..." said one of them.

"Or we could string him upside down from the fire escape with a yellow scarf over his mouth." another shrugged.

"Well we have to do something with this little bitch." said the man holding me.

My eyes narrowed. I reached for the cool metal of my switchblade and in a swift motion despite my intoxication, drug it over his arm, leaving a deep cut, "Who you calling a bitch you mother fucker?" I said as the thug bent over in pain.

"Shit! SHIT! You LITTLE SHIT!" he shouted clutching his arm.

I stepped into his back, pressing his face into the concrete, "Shut up, your giving me a migraine with all that fucking screaming." I said, throwing my hand against my forehead in exasperation.

"Who the hell are you?" another asked.

"I'm Izaya Orihara, _bitch_." I introduced myself. Then, all of a sudden the man under me stood up, knocking me to the ground. I blacked out shortly afterwards...

The next thing I knew I was in some abandoned parking complex, soaked with cold water for tow men had just drenched me, a bunch of yellow scarves around me. The most noticeable was the one that covered my mouth.

Where the fuck was Kida when I needed him? Not that the appearance of the teen would make much of a difference... He would probably kill me right on the spot if he knew he had me in his power while his minions from what I gathered only planned to ransom me. If I had not been gagged, I would have laughed at the notion. Who the hell were they going to ransom me to, Namie, Shiki? I doubted it.

The only people in the world that were ever willing to pay for me were Johns. Maybe they would sell me to Shizu-chan so he could kill me, I smiled then, I bet he would love that, but Shizu-chan made dirt look expensive. In retrospect, I know that there was no way they could have known her desire for me, but I started to think about if they sold me to Izumi... She would smile at me and tell me something about people who run away from their past are doomed to repeat it. Then she would kiss me...

Before I knew it there were tears on my face, blending with the water I was already drenched in. But these tears weren't like the others, there was really no fear nor any pride in them. Merely a crippling shame, I killed her... I destroyed her. I destroy everything I touch, including myself...

Whoever these people decided to sell me to I would deserve everything they did. For being weak, for crying in front of my beloved humans for the second time in the past week, more then I had in my entire life... I remembered how my father used to lock me in my room whenever I cried when I was younger.

I was to be the next messiah, I was shaming myself, my name and my family by displaying such a human weakness. If my father could see me now I'd get the beating of a life time... Maybe they would ransom me to my family... To my sisters, they would never pay though. They would merely ask for pictures of what my body looked like after they were done.

Someone would come, I just didn't know who yet.

"I can't take my eyes off of you for one minute, can I?" I knew that voice, I looked up. To see a pair of sliver sunglasses looking back at me. _Izumi?_

I must have been to deep in my own self pity to hear the ruckus for around her was all the gang members groaning on the floor. There was no blood though, making it safe to assume she hadn't used her gun. There she stood, clad in all white accept for her red tie, her features flawless, her hair falling almost to perfectly on her shoulders. Whether she looked like an angel or a demon was up for debate as it always was.

She pulled out my pocket knife and I cringed, remembering last time. But she only cut through the gag and through the ropes that bound me to the chair.

"Can you walk?" she asked me in the gentlest of tone.

"I think so..." I answered even more softly, as if this were a time to whisper, I tried to stand up, but fell down shortly, she caught me. I smiled mirthlessly and shook my head.

She slid her arms under me and lifted me up bridal style, "Izaya, say the alphabet backwards for me."

I don't know why I obeyed so instantly, maybe it was my guilt or fear, but I think it had more to do with the unfaltering gentleness in her tone, "Z, Y, X, W, C, U, D, E, F, G.. errr... ummm..." where was I?

Izumi sighed then, "That's what I thought, have you been drinking?"

"What business is it of yours?" I spat, "If anything, this makes your job easier! I'm a lot easier when I'm all doped up!" I shouted, not realizing why the hell I was so angry at her, she had just saved me after all.

She made a small noise, her expression indifferent, "I know that, but I prefer the challenge over this. Why do you think I kept you sober most of the time when we were together. You aren't quite yourself when you're drunk." she said.

I wasn't sure whether I was supposed to be flattered or insulted. So I just wrapped my arms around her neck and went along for the ride, "Where ya' taking me?"

"Home."

I laughed, "Buy a guy dinner first."

"_You're_ home, Izaya. So you can sleep this off." she said.

"What are you my mother?" I mumbled, I was tired already.

"If I recall correctly, your mother was a controlling bitch."

"What's your point?" I asked with a smile, pressing my face into her warm shoulder, taking in the almost manly smell of her shampoo.

"Very funny."

"How do you know where I live anyways?" I asked her. _Keep her talking..._

"You aren't the only one who can find information, sweetheart." she said.

"My name is Izaya..." I said softly, closing my eyes and letting myself drift off. When did being held and rocked become so peaceful?

"I'm not sure you ever really wanted that name..." she said to me, running her fingers through my hair. It felt nice, she didn't even pull at all...

She carried me into my building, past Namie.

"Who the hell are you?" my receptionist asked.

I could tell by the tone of her voice that Izumi gave her a glare as cold as ice, "I'm no one, you never saw me. Get it?"

"Got it."

I couldn't help but giggle.

She carried me into the elevator, still stroking the back of my head, she must have noticed the blood, "I'm going to kill those little brats."

"Why?"

"Because they made the mistake of hurting someone I care about."

I giggled, "I guess you're the only one allowed to hurt me, Izumi... I'm flattered."

By her tone I could tell she was smiling, "Shut up," the words were more endearing then ordering.

She laid me down on my bed and kissed my forehead, "Wanna hear something funny, Izumi-chan?" I asked, "I came to Ikebukuro because I was gonna kill you..." I laughed, never realizing the sadism in my words.

For a second, she seemed hurt, then she smiled, "I know, Izaya, I know..."

I giggled, "Good night, Izumi."

"Good night, Izaya." she cupped my cheek, "You know, for such an annoying guy, you sure can be cute sometimes..."

"I know."

I rolled over and waited until she thought I had passed out to open them, I watched her leave out the window... Her white jacket blowing in the wind.

"Silly Izaya," she laughed before jumping.

I closed my eyes, wincing and blinking. My head ach told me I was becoming more sober... "What the hell just happened?"

**Reviews fuel my creative process and fight writers block! Please review.**


	8. Chapter 8

Masaomi POV

I developed the yellow scarves to feel like I was someone when I was alone, I never imagined the repercussions of my actions. I never dreamed of the violence and blood that would spread, the smell of blood and the sound of gunshots. The dependency it would create... I trusted a man who had always rubbed me the wrong way. I only realized the horror when he betrayed me, and I lost everything.

It saved and nearly ended my life. It nearly destroyed someone I cared about because I wasn't strong enough to save her.

I thought I had given up the drug of the yellow-scarves forever, but when someone I LOVED was hurt I realized that I still needed my monsters; I let them drag me back down under, however, as long as the protect the people I love, I will protect them with every thing I have.

The reason I came to the headquarters early that morning because I had read some rumors in the chat room about some gang violence in an alley, and I was afraid that the yellow-scarves were involved.

However, this wasn't what I had expected to see.

The moment I had started to open the door, it fell in with a loud clank and I saw that that it had been ripped from it's hinges and merely set back into place. It was then that I saw the full extent of the damage inflicted on the base. The busted up concrete and metal everywhere would have been bad enough with out the members of my gang laying over them, bruised , beat up, and groaning. I nudged one, he merely fell off the place he was laying on. I stepped away.

I scanned the place until I found a conscious member, the only conscious member. He was hiding under a table, shaking his ass off. I jerked him out of his hiding place.

"WHO the HELL, DID THIS?" I asked him. It had to the oldest fucking member of the yellow scarves. He hid, while all the other member fought, while they fell. That alone shows just how reliable adults are.

He winced, "Some crazy chick in white just busted in and started takin' the guys out for no damn reason!" he said.

I stepped back, _The morning killer._

I stepped forward again, taking a deep breath as I processed this, "A crazy chick in white, huh, what did she look like?"

"It all happened so fast-" I grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and brought him to my eye level.

"What. The. Hell. Did. She. Look. Like?" I asked slowly, attempting to keep my temper in check.

He gulped and stuttered out, "W-well, sh-she hard dark hair.."

I shoved him to the ground, "That could be anyone in Japan!" I growled through my teeth, angrier at myself than I was at him. I should have fucking been there when she burst in. I should have been able to stop this. DAMMIT.

I couldn't even protect my own monsters.

I'm not sure when I started to pace back and forth, I only realized when I saw the guys eyes following me. My mind was desperately trying to wrap itself around this incident and why it could have happened... I went through several different ideas.

Could there be another color gang starting up Ikebukuro? The white jackets or something? Trying to assert themselves as a forced to be feared? That would screw everything up... Like I needed that on top of the dollars and slashers. Then it hit me.

_The dollars. She was a member of the dollars!_

I stopped and looked back over at the older thug,"She just showed up here for no reason?" I asked, he nodded, "She wasn't provoked in any way, that's what you're saying?"

"Naw man, she just busted in." he said.

She had to be a member of the dollars. Those fucking bastards! Screw Kadota and everything he said about the dallors! If anything, they were too free! The bastards did whatever they wanted, whenever they want, and never gave a fucking damn who they hurt.

I grabbed the fucking thug and shook him again "I want her found, now!" I threw him down again.

"Right boss, right." he scurried away.

The underworld of gangs faded into the innocent world above as I went to school the next day... I walked down the hallway of the high-school. My mind was still racing, and, for once, I wasn't taking any breaks to talk.

"Masa-" I walked past Mikado without giving him a second look. My mind wasn't on him, it was on the leader of the dollars.

The dollars had over stepped the boundaries, attacking our base. How the hell could they know where our base was when we couldn't find out a single thing about them?

I needed to find out who the leader of these bastards was.

I wasn't paying attention, even though it seems like something I would do on purpose, when my face pressed into a pair of breasts. They were my math teacher's, Izumi's. Apparently, she had something on her mind also. I fell on top of her, my face still between her boobs.

She blushed as I continued to lay there, "Masaomi, could you get off?"

"Yeah, yeah..." I got up and offered her my hand, she took it and I helped her up.

"So, mister Kida, something you wanna talk about?" she asked, brushing herself off.

"Not really, Ms. Matsuda..." I said, she gave an odd look, "Izumi, sorry."

"That's alright, Masaomi. What's on your mind? Girl troubles? I'm afraid I wouldn't be much help with that. I never had much luck with girls when I was in high-school." she said with a smile. It was my turn to give her an odd look. It took her a second to realize why, "Boys, I meant boys. Though if I were going after girls I doubt I would have any luck with them either."

"Well, it's nothing like that, just some stupid crap I've been trying to deal with lately." I said.

"Well, like what? I can probably help out. I'm pretty knowledgeable when it comes to most things." she said. She moved over to the stairs and sat down, gesturing me to do also, I obeyed.

I chuckled, "I doubt you can help me with this."

"Try me."

"Well..." How the hell can I explain this?

I didn't know why I so easily opened up to her... I had never before really discussed these issues with anyone who wasn't there when it happened, and not even often then. But it came so easy to me, it was almost like talking to someone who couldn't speak. It felt safe. She was so reserved and calm, just listening without any interruption... Even though the version of the story I told her was abridged, everything I told her was true.

"That's a heavy burden you're putting on yourself. To protect everyone." she said softly, looking at me over the ridge of her glasses.

"It's my fault." I whispered.

"Whatever you did, it's in the past. It doesn't matter. Defend people from danger as it comes, but don't start getting paranoid looking over your shoulder at everyone who passes by, " she pulled her knees to herself, "or you really will lose everything. Humans have a record for seeing precaution as mistrust. And in a way, they're right. In addition, when you're constantly looking back over your shoulder for, you may miss what's right in front of you."

It was that moment that the bell rang, "I've got to go," I said, running off.

"Don't let the past be your god!" Izumi shouted after me and I froze. Could it really be that obvious?

For the rest of the day, my mind was racing about everything. The dollars, the mourning killer, the slashers, what Izaya had so often said to me. What Izumi had said.

It all came down to one thing, the same thing it always did. Saki, the girl who only went out with me because Izaya told her to and now told me that I would never be able to leave her as hard as I may try.

Maybe, I needed to see her again. I waited until after school to head to the hospital. It was outside in my usual spot where I saw the man I least wanted to run into.

Izaya, fucking, Orihara.

"Masa, what are you doing here?" he asked, much less enthusiastically than usual.

"What the fuck are you doing here, Izaya?" I shouted. Not expecting him to wince.

"I asked you first," he said.

"I'm here to see Saki, and you?" I said.

He pulled at his jacket, it was then that I saw he was wearing a turtleneck under it, "Oh, nothing in particular. Just out for a stroll."

"What's with the clothes?" I asked him. Some how, I knew I was being cruel, but I hated Izaya.

"I was cold." he answered, rubbing his arm.

"Really Izaya?" I said, "You know it's 82 degrees out."

"I'm cold-blooded," he said with a smile, "you of all people should know that, Kida. So you're here to see your god... Little Saki."

I scowled.

"Are you actually going to go in this time, Kida. Or just stand outside like you always do?" he asked me in his usual smug tone.

"You know what, Izaya? FUCK YOU." I ran into the hospital, just to spite him and prove him wrong. In the back of my mind I realized it was that same desire that drove girls who talked to him to jump off of buildings, but I was too fucking pissed to care.

I stomped up the stairs, shoving nurses aside as I ran through the hallways to Saki's room. Then it happened, my hand was on the door knob into her room when I froze.

A year, it had been a year, and I still couldn't face her. I could even hear her voice through the door.

"Masa, Masa? Is that you? I told you, you would always come back." she said.

For a second I was shocked and disappointed in myself, but then I came to a realization. I ran down the stairs even faster than I had run up them, and 10 times more determined. I ran through the revolving door and saw Orihara trying to walk away.

"IZAYA!" I shouted, he bolted around.

He smiled, "So, you didn't have the courage to do it after-"

"SHUT THE HELL UP! And just listen for once, you fucking little bastard!" I shouted at the top of my lungs.

"Ma-"

I grabbed him and threw him to the ground, "I said, shut the fuck up!" I was sitting on his hips and he was starting to hyperventilate.

"Masaomi, please don't do this... God please, please... please..." he closed his eyes.

"Afraid of someone finally telling you off? Get over it." I grabbed his head and jerked it back, forcing him to look at me, I'd always fantasized about doing something like this to him, but I had never gotten this far before without a knife being put to my throat, "You think you know everything about humans. Everything they think and feel, but you don't understand at all. YOU'RE A FUCKING SOSIOPATH. The only way you can get any satisfaction or pleasure is by screwing other people over. You think that whenever they do what you expect, it proves that you know everything about them. BUT YOU'RE WRONG! You force people to do things you know are contrary to everything they believe and want in themselves. You made Shizuo violent, and me rely on an adult, but you know that and you get a kick out of it don't you? You can only be happy as long as everyone else is miserable. You think you have everything under control but you can't even control yourself," his eyes widened then, "and you certainly can't control me. I didn't leave that hospital because I was afraid; I never go to see her because I don't want to. I've never really wanted to see her, she makes me feel bad about myself every time I go and see her. I wanted to break up with her a lone time ago. I didn't because _she _made me feel guilty about something I never would have been able to prevent in the first place, SOMETHING SHE DIDN'T EVEN KNOW ABOUT. You sent her to me because you knew that she would do that. But I'm not letting her do that. You may be able to control everything she does, but you can't control me." I threw him to the ground then, seeing a little blood trickle onto the concrete from the back of his head.

He made no effort to stand up, just laid there. I looked down at him.

To anyone else, he would have looked so innocent, so scared and vulnerable, but he wasn't, and I knew better.

"Saki isn't my god, and neither are you."

I said to him before walking away.

**Whoa, who thought for a second that Masaomi was going to go **_**way **_**over bourd? I mean, other then Izaya? I think that I might right a sort of alternative to how that meeting could have ended... Give me an idea if you would want to read something like that.**

**And even if you wouldn't, Please Review.**


	9. Chapter 9

Third person POV

He came into Ikebukuro because he wanted to kill her...

No idea made her stomach churn quite like that one.

Izumi's mid was racing with a million different thoughts. Why did this surprise her; why did it hurt so much? He had already killed her once, this shouldn't surprise her.

But, when he was in her arms, smiling and laughing it was almost like things had once been. When everything was good, when she was in love. How could she have been so blind to such a deep resentment?

She was kind to him. She saved him from a horrible life, a life of torture and neglect! She may have not have returned him home as he would have liked, but she had always taken good care of him. She did everything right. She loved him. She protected him. She still loved him

"Ungh, Izaya, what did I ever do to make you hate me so much?" she asked aloud, looking over the balcony outside her apartment To her, the humans below looked like ants. She laid her head down on the cold concrete guard rail. "Maybe he's gay."

Damn, Izaya didn't like guys either; in fact, he was scared to death of men when she had first met him. Her cat, always seeming to sense her distress, jumped on the balcony rail to join her. She gave a sad giggle and petted his head softly with the back of her hand. Some times the day she met his name sake felt like yesterday; and sometimes, a life time ago.

In this woman's previous life, her name was Izumi Chang; but that was not enough to explain the workings of the woman's clockwork mind.

She wasn't just any from any common family of Changs. In fact, she was the ex-CEO of "Chang entertainment productions and talent agency" (CEPTA industries) a position she acquired at the age of nine from her father. He had been forced to resign do to ethical charges.

Once, when she was only six, she accidentally killed her fencing partner. Being the child she was her first reaction was one of horror and regret.

She heard her father's voice behind her, _"Relax, his life was pointless to begin with. He just lived to make you a better. Humans are cattle, let the end of his life serve as a landmark in yours." _

She nodded gently, hardening her soft expression. Those words shaped the rest of her life.

She learned to acquire everything she could ever want whether through money she got selling young actors as prostitutes or be simple manipulation.

CEPTA had never been just an ordinary talent agency; it had always engaged in some very shady business ventures. The company had more power then any other institution in Japan. They pulled the strings of all the major politicians... news organizations, and anything they couldn't control they bought and/or destroyed.

As previously mentioned, the major profitable sector of CEPTA wasn't even film or star production; it was human trafficking. More specifically, prostitution. After the company had juiced everything they could out of a young star, we would sell them into prostitution and the media would just write it off as just another former star dropping off the map.

The girl knew her job, she cared very little for humans in the beginning, but after years working in the business in a world of wolves and lambs for slaughter, a world of traitors and tricksters... that simple apathy had turned to hate. She was sixteen when she finally met someone she could love.

Normally, she wouldn't have bothered to dirty her own hands, but this was a matter of special importance. People all over Tokyo were disappearing and she had grown sick of covering for the man responsible. Even monsters have limits.

The man's name was Sato Arata and he was the owner of the most popular ring of brothels in all of Japan. The bleach-blonde was kidnapping teenagers of the streets, children with families and homes to make them into prostitutes.

She arrived at his mansion, the guards greeted her respectfully and ushered her into Arata's office. She knew that they were trying to prevent her from seeing the condition of the prostitutes, but she was far too callous at that age to care.

_He was sitting at his desk, one of his lackeys tapped him on the shoulder and whispered something in his ear, "Who the hell has the nerve to-" he began loudly before spinning around in his chair. Upon seeing her face he became silent for a moment. Then he gave a nervous chuckle._

"_Izumi-chan! Long time no see!" he stood up, "It seems like you were just a baby last time I saw you! Can I get you a soda, kiddo?"_

"_I am __**not **__a child," she said stiffly, "and this is not a social call. I know what you've been up to and I don't like it."_

_His smile broke for an instant, "I don't know what you're talking about."_

"_Are you going to make me say it?" she sighed, "You've been kidnapping kids, runaways mostly, and selling their bodies to fat bastards to make yourself a quick buck."_

_He grinned, "When you say it like that it sounds so distasteful."_

_She scowled, "You make it sound like it was classy to begin with, yours is a distasteful business._

"_I have only put up with it while it was mutually beneficial, but your kidnapping of minors does not benefit my business. It's a betrayal of my trust, and it brings far too much attention to your business and __**mine**__. People are angry, Arata, and scared."_

_Arata threw his head back a laughed, "Since when do you care about people?"_

"_I don't." she said honestly, her voice flat, "I hate them. I think they are disgusting and vile; however, this isn't about them. This is about me. We had a deal, Arata. If you don't stop this I'll make sure this place burns to the ground."_

_He threw his head back and gave another hearty laugh, "You're so cute," he gestured his head to the guards on his right, they aimed there guns at her, "You actually think you stand a chance against me._

"You are a child, as tough as you pretend to be. You're green, Izumi. You came to me, alone, unarmed and with no plan of action. Did you really think that you were just so damn intimidating that you could just come in here and demand I listen to you? I don't need you. Did you really think you could get me to bend to your wishes?" his tone was nothing if not condescending and arrogant.

_There was no way he expected what happened next. _

_Young Izumi slipped her hand into her suit pocket and- "Yes."-smirked._

_It seemed to take Arata a moment to realize his guards were dead- and to see the smoking gun in the so-called 'child's' hand. His eyes became impossibly large, his sunglasses sliding down his nose. He turned to her so fast he could have given himself whiplash._

"_Yo-you just- You-you've killed them!"_

_She blew into the barrel with a chuckle, "Am I intimidating now, Arata?" she asked him, aiming the gun at his head._

"_Ye-hes! You're intimidating! Fucking SCARY if you ask me."_

_She cocked her head to the side, "Do you really believe that?" she asked in mock modesty, "I am a mere __**child**__ after all."_

"_Age has nothing to do with it!" the pimp nearly screamed._

"_Oh, come on Arata. You don't really believe that." her smile never left._

"_I do!" he assured desperately, "and I'll make sure everyone else does too! You have to let me live, so I can pass it on!"_

_She made a thoughtful sound, "Is that really all you want, Arata? To live?" she asked him, her voice suddenly airy and solemn._

_He nodded._

_She had to force herself not to chuckle, "Alright," only one thought was going through her mind._

Be careful what you wish for...

"_Show me around the house," she tucked her gun away._

_He seemed taken off guard, "W-what?"_

"_Show me around the house," she repeated herself in a sigh, her patience wearing thin, "but if you try something, I will not hesitate to kill you."_

_That was incredibly clear._

"_O-okay," he said hastily, stumbling over the dead bodies of his own guards as he went over to the door, throwing it open. She fallowed him, her face casually expressionless._

"_Is there something in particular you want to see first?" he was in no position to argue with her about removing the dead bodies before going out. Not that Arata cared about the men, he was merely worried about what the blood would do his pristine white carpet._

"_Where do you keep your bulls?" she asked him._

_It seemed to take a moment for Arata to realize what the young corporate was talking about, if humans were cattle, then men were bulls, "You mean the male prostitutes? Upstairs, follow me."_

_Arata stepped into the elevator, Izumi followed._

_When they reached the top floor the elevator stopped and dinged. When the doors opened the first thing they both heard was a scream and the pained voice of a child. _

"_I'm sorry! I'M SORRY!"_

_Izumi's eyes widened, "What the hell is that?!" she snapped, running to the source of the sound. _

"_No!" Arata said suddenly, "Anyone but him! He's in with a client-"_

_More screams could be heard through the door._

"_I can hear that," Izumi growled. As callous as she was, she had always thought that prostitutes always became accustomed to having a soft life. That they eventually would begin to enjoy being cared for and receiving payment for an act that didn't require education or even skill. She was about to realize just how wrong she really was._

_Ignoring Arata's protest she shot the lock out and kicked down the door. Out of all the horrifying things Izumi had seen in her life, this certainly took the cake. On the bed was an obese old man with his suit pants down around his knees, mid-thrust into a boy who was only roughly a third of his size like he was a rag-doll. Tears were caught in the boys eyelashes, as well as running down his cheeks which were red from a mixture of strain and humiliation, his eyes were wide with pain and fear, blood running down his bare thighs._

_Izumi's eyes widened before filling with rage. The sight had stirred something inside her that even she believed to be dead. She wanted to do more than kill the man, but she settled for that. _

_She grabbed the obese man with both hands and threw him off the boy and onto the ground, the small ravenette clutching the headboard with a whimper as the violation left him._

"_Who the hell do you-" the fat bastard brazenly began. Izumi shot him where he stood, his body falling to the carpet with a dull thud. _

_Arata ran over to the body, "He was a congressman!"_

"_Yeah, yeah, I don't give a shit. Blame it on one of your little whores. Just not this one." she went over to the shaking boy, pulling of her white suit jacket and offering it to him. Hesitantly, he took it, draping it over his narrow shoulders._

"_Are you a cop?" the boy asked meekly._

_Izumi almost laughed at the notion, "No, sweety. I'm not a cop. I'm not here to take you to jail." she told him, "May I ask how old you are?"_

_The boy looked past her shoulder at Arata, fear still evident on his face, "Eigh-eighteen"_

_There was no way in the world this boy could have been mistaken for eighteen, "Don't lie to me," she glared at the pimp, "there's no need."_

"_13."_

_That sounded much more accurate to Izumi. She knew the boy wasn't one of hers, which meant he was a runaway, "Your name-"_

"_I-Izaya."_

_The name seemed so ironic given the situation she'd found him in. She resisted the urge to laugh, he'd probably never wanted such a name. Izumi Chang didn't believe in messiahs, "How nice," she said softly, "Do you know where some large prostitutes are, even bigger then Arata?"_

_He gave her a confused look but answered nonetheless, "Down the hall."_

_She smiled at him, "Thank you," she gave Arata a quick glance before looking back at Izaya, "Do you want to see something really cool?" she asked, but immediately thought better of it. The boy was only thirteen and he'd seen enough bad things in his life. She had no desire to add to that list, "On second thought, never mind. Just stay here, in this room, whatever you hear, okay?"_

_He nodded gently, she patted his head._

"_Arata," she turned back to the pimp, summoning her most innocent smile, "I thought you were giving me a tour."_

_Arata swallowed his fear and his anger standing up, "R-right," he got up and ran to the door._

_She fallowed him out, pausing to give Izaya a gentle smile before pushing the now pointless door back into place. Izumi allowed Arata to show her each room, giving quick descriptions of each prostitute. Once she heard a description of one she liked she told him to come in with me._

_He blanched, "Why?"_

_She gave her a glare colder than ice, "So I can keep my eye on you. What did you think?" she asked him._

_He didn't dare answer. He opened the door for her and they went in, inside the room was a man much larger then Arata in a pair of jean shorts. _

"_Stay here, Arata," she ordered before going over to the young prostitute, sparing him a smile as she gestured to the corner._

_He sighed at went there with her._

"_Look, I don't kiss so don't ask-"_

"_It's not me," she said then lowered her voice until it was scarcely above a whisper, "it's Arata, I want you to give him a taste of his own medicine."_

_He stepped back, "Who do you think you- never mind. Look, I don't want to get-"_

"_Just tell him I told you he has a rape fantasy. All his guards are dead and as soon as you're done you can walk out. Even leave here if you want, your certainly old enough to take care of yourself and there still is the adult film industry."_

_He frowned, "Is this some kind of loyalty test?"_

"_No. I don't work for Arata and never would." she said honestly._

_The man rubbed his chin, "So there's no way I can get in trouble for this?"_

_Izumi smiled, "Nope."_

_He was sold. If there was anything Izumi knew it was how to work the system, to manipulate. Humans are such depraved, sick, vengeful, and- "Arata!" -easily swayed._

_Arata jumped, but not in time to avoid being driven back into the mattress by the prostitute._

"_What the hell are you-" he began._

"_I just heard that all this time you've had a__** rape**__ fantasy!" he started to pull off Arata's coat. He looked over at Izumi with fear on his face. She wiggled her fingers at him._

"_YOU EVIL BITCH!" Arata shouted at her, then turned to the prostitute, his eyes large and pleading, "She's lying! She's LYING!"_

_The prostitute ignored Arata,(not that the man had ever given him a reason to not to) pulling off his shirt, "You know, your almost cute like this," he said, breaking his own rule to kiss the pimp's quivering lips, "Have you ever been taken by a man?" he slipped his hand into Arata's pants, gripping the warm flesh between his legs. Arata moaned like a- well, like a dirty whore. While the pimp was distracted in his pleasure he pulled of his shoes and then his pants. He caressed Arata's nipples slowly as he pulled of his boxers. He fought, but without all his guards he was defenseless and didn't even succeed in slowing him down. The prostitute ran his tongue over three of his fingers and inserted all of them into Arata's clenching ass. Arata screamed, but surprisingly his erection didn't deflate even slightly. Izumi chuckled silently, maybe Arata was a bit of a masochist._

_When he finally entered Arata the pimp gave a soft groan, his resistance was almost gone. He just laid there. Within a few moments, Arata was making a bunch of weird noises and none of them were innocent. Izumi knew enough about human anatomy to know from the angle alone that the prostitute was striking the pimp's prostrate. _

"_Feels good, doesn't it?" the prostitute said thrusting in sharply. This was probably a quote he had heard many times before._

_Arata gave a soft whimper. His face was normally harsh but not now, his cheeks were flushed and his eyes had fallen to mere slits, blond hair sticking to his sweaty forehead. He hardly looked threatening._

_Izumi continued to watch until both men reached climax, not because she was a pervert; the whole time she watched them she felt nothing, registered nothing. She just wanted to understand the full outcomes of her plan._

_The prostitute pulled out of Arata. Arata gave her a weary, if not angry look._

"_All you asked was to be allowed to live." Izumi said with emotionless expression as she left the room._

_She returned to the room where Izaya was waiting to find him shaking. She didn't realize it, but he had followed her and had seen everything._

"_You okay?" she asked him. To her he looked innocent and vulnerable, completely unlike all the monsters in her life, not terrified and panicked. Even a monster can be terrified and panicked._

"_Are you going to rape me?" considering what he had just seen, and what he didn't know, this wasn't an unreasonable question._

_Her eyes widened, "No," she wrapped her arms around his thin body, Izaya forced himself not to shake, "never, sweetheart. I will never rape you."_

"_Then why did you stop him?" he asked softly, gesturing to the corpse only a few feet away._

_Even Izumi herself didn't know how to answer that, "I'll be taking care of you from now on." she said against his neck, stroking his soft hair._

_Izaya closed his eyes, she-she was crazy. She was going to kill him. That and a million other horrible things ran into Izaya's mind with those word. Every caretaker he'd ever had abused him in one way or another._

_Suddenly, while Izaya was distracted in his thoughts Izumi slid her hands under his legs and lifted him up into her arms._

"_Wha-what are you-" _

_She hushed him gently, "You're safe."_

_That was the first time someone had ever said that to him, but she sounded genuine. Either she was being honest or she was the maddest person he'd ever encountered. Considering she just watched a man be raped the second was probably true._

_Izumi carried him out of the brothel and into her pristine white limo. Supporting Izaya's seemingly frail body with one arm and she opened the door and sat down, positioning him in her lap._

"_Comfortable?" she asked him with a smile as she closed the door behind them._

_Izaya wasn't sure what to think or how to feel. He let his head rest on Izumi's shoulder, nodding softly. Whatever she had in store couldn't be worse then what he had already been through._

_Izumi's limo driver looked at the couple curiously._

_She gave him an intentful look, "I trust I can count on your discretion."_

_The driver smiled, "Always, ma'am."_

_Izumi ran her hand down Izaya's back, trying to ease the tension out of the child. Suddenly she felt wetness on her lap, she looked down to see a crimson stain forming. She looked at Izaya with concern_

"_I-I'm sorry, I thought that had stopped," Izaya stuttered._

_She held him closer, "I'll protect you from this day forward," she promised him, "until the day I die."_

_Izaya suddenly pushed away from her, holding onto her shoulders, his face flushed, "How can you cay things like that?!" he said, "You haven't even known me-"_

_She covered his lips very gently with her own and to the surprise of them both, Izaya kissed back. Even though he'd been a prostitute for two years he had never been kissed, especially not by a girl._

_Izaya really didn't care who she was at that moment, he knew he was safer now than he was yesterday. He had an angel._

_That was the beginning of the end for Izumi Chang, for the sure road to death for any Chang is falling in love._

She kept her promise, she protected him- Izumi slid to the floor of the balcony, clutching her chest, "It-it hurts... so much..." -until the day she died.

_Sometimes a monster is the only angel you get._


	10. Chapter 10

Izaya POV

I lay in my bed staring at the ceiling tiredly. I rubbed the back of my head which was still sore and pounding.

"Stupid yellow-scarves, stupid Masa, stupid alcohol, stupid Izumi, stupid everything!" I muttered. How could everything go so wrong, so fast? How could the appearance of one woman change so much?

It had only been a night ago when she carried me home and put me to bed (fully dressed, like a child) but then, she just left. She used to hold me every night until I fell asleep in her arms, stroking my back and saying stupid but sweet words...

_That's before you murdered her, Izaya._

With that thought, I curled into a small ball, pulling my legs to myself. A memory slid back into my conscious mind, a memory I had been trying to forget for nearly a decade... I feel old now...

_Izumi leaned over me, pressing me back against the wall and making a sort of cage with her arms. Her hands splayed on the wall on either side on the wall on either side of me. I tensed but didn't freak out or panic, I had grown used to her acting creepy. Most of the time, she acted frightening to elicit reactions from people. Cute little Izumi loved to be the center of my attention._

_However, she surprised me that day. One of her hands left the wall to take one of my own, threading our fingers together._

"_Izaya-kun," she whispered my name sweetly into my ear, sighing in what seemed like utter bliss as she bent her head to kiss my neck. She traced gentle patterns with her tongue, sucking some places and nibbling others. Suddenly, she bit down on the most sensitive part of my neck. I gave a soft gasp as little tears caught in my eyelashes. I found myself pressing into her all the same, arching my back, letting my head fall back for the possessive bite._

_She licked the spot on my neck soothingly as to apologize, whispering sweet words._

_I never returned them, same as her caresses, but hearing them brought a smile to my lips. Izumi was by far the silliest human I have ever met. She always told me how beautiful I was, (maybe physically), how gentle, (how would she know, I never really touched her?) how sweet, (the very idea of that one made me laugh) how perfect I was._

_Not yet, I thought, _but I will be.

_I giggled, "You have a major perception bias."_

_She gave an exceedingly rare, true smile, "The radiance of the one you love always shines brightest," she murmured, covering my lips with hers. Most of the time, when she kissed me she was in complete control, everything routine, but this kiss was completely different. She kissed me with such a level of neediness and vigor that it was almost frightening. Her lips moved against mine with a hunger and passion that threatened to swallow me alive. Out of all of these things, what surprised me the most is that I couldn't taste a bit of chloroform on her lips._

_I was dizzy and flushed when she broke the kiss a few minutes later, halfway through I had forgotten how to breath. Smoothly, I covered my shock and dizziness with a smile, "Well, tonight must be special! Izumi isn't drugging me before taking me to bed!"_

"_I always try to wash it off," the older teen panted, for a moment, I wondered why she had allowed herself to become so vulnerable, "I just took extra precaution tonight."_

_She bent down lower and started to kiss my collar bone, her words just got mushier and mushier._

_I had to fight back the giggles every time she used the word "love", it was such a human word for a person who hated the creatures as much as Izumi. Humans always seemed to think that love meant forever, but in reality it was a silly, temporary word. Eventually, Izumi like everyone else would grow tired of me and move onto someone else. Gods are the only creatures that will experience eternal love from any creature on earth._

"_You're so damn young..." she whispered, cupping my cheek, "you haven't even turned fifteen yet..."_

_Izumi's love was especially temporary, because she was a pedophile, who else would have sex with a thirteen year old child? Or have sex with a 14 year old child that would start high-school next year as a way to celebrate their eighteenth birthday?_

_That was what I expected to happen, I expected her touching to get more intimate leading up to sex, but that wasn't what happened at all._

"_I have something for you," she whispered._

_Once she released my hands, I clapped, "A present!"_

_She slipped her hand into her white coat pocket. I expected to see a condom or something else related to sex but that wasn't what it was. I was a red velvet box._

_My facade dropped to the floor like a cheap Halloween mask, my heart leapt into my throat. I was confused, shocked and nervous and I didn't even know why._

_She opened the little box, in it was a shiny, platinum ring. She leaned into me, her lips brushing mine with every syllable, "Marry me."_

_Suddenly, her love felt very permanent... terrifyingly so. People didn't marry the meaningless flings they had when they were teenagers. Pedophiles didn't marry their victims. That was the breaking point, before I even understood what was going on my vision darkened briefly and my body seemed to move of its own accord._

_Next thing I saw was her body falling back on the floor, blood soaking her chest where I realized my knife had penetrated. Her eyes were wide and her mouth was open in a silent scream as she landed, in her right hand was the small ring I have worn every day since. I took it from her, shaking and tucking my bloody knife away in my pocket. I ran away and never came back. _

"I killed Izumi Chang," I whispered to myself though I found it hard to believe, "But here she is."

I played with the ring that I kept all these years for only God knows why, using my thumb to twirl it around my finger slowly. I wasn't so sentimental as to wear it on my ring finger, and I had purchased another ring for my right hand so no one would ask me why I just wore the one. My secrets are mine, and my past was my biggest secret of all. I slipped the platinum ring off my finger, the only difference between the ring I had bought and the one she gave me was that the one she gave me was engraved on the inside. _The radiance of the one you love always shines brightest. _It was always her special way of telling me to screw myself when I told her I was no good for her.

At first, the thought of her being alive terrified and dumbfounded me, but now that the initial shock had worn off it just annoyed the hell out of me. She broke the rules of my game. If you die, you lose. It was the one rule that always stayed true when all the others were in fluctuation, it had completely failed me.

I kept the ring Izumi gave me to remind myself to not end up like her, to not give my heart to someone who didn't deserve it, someone who would hurt me, to never love at all. Despite all the rumors in Ikebukuro about me being an easy lay, Izumi was my last, I hadn't ever even been kissed by another person. If Izumi though I was going to lie down and become her subservient little sex-pet; however, she was sadly mistaken.

My head's throbbing worsened and my eyebrows furrowed. I knew I should probably make an appointment with Shinra but I didn't think I could stand his questions.

"I'm an informant!" I sprung out of bed, "Why am I trying to figure all this out by myself?"

I crossed my room and went over to my beloved computer, sitting down and typing Izumi's name into my _special _search engine.

Most every entry under her name said the same thing, _Izumi Chang, youngest CEO in Japan died on the eve of her 18__th__ birthday. The circumstances of her death are still unclear._ Other entries were about her life and her funeral, apparently, her father "had her body cremated and scattered".

"No body, no evidence," I whispered softly. I read through every single article and couldn't even find a single picture of her body.

I sighed and leaned back after hours of staring at my computer, sighing and rubbing my eyes. I looked over at the clock. _2:36 a.m. _It had been almost twelve hours since Masa had pushed me down, straddled my waist, scared the living shit out of me. I thought I felt helpless when Izumi had me pinned, but she was at least being predictable for the most part, what Masa had done was completely out of character. He was supposed to glare at me, maybe call me a name or two and then leave. He wasn't supposed to tackle me. Did I really appear that weak?

I sighed, giving up on the machine in front of me, "I suppose I'll just have to take care of this myself." I glanced at the time again. _Tomorrow._

The next day I left late and went about Shinjuku and Ikebukuro. I went about asking people questions, threatening people and playing with thugs. One kid told me his whole life story and how he stole twenty bucks from a pregnant woman once. Still, known of them seemed to know a thing.

All I got from any of them was, "Oh her? Didn't she die?"

"Oh, her? She died a couple years ago I heard."

"She died."

"I heard she was murdered by some little whore."

By about the 19th guy I was losing my patience, "Don't give me that crap, I know she's alive. I saw her."

"That's not possible. She's dea~" I pressed my knife into the sensitive flesh of the man's jugular, he cringed.

"Say she's dead one more time and I'll make sure someone matches that description." I said to him in a low, threatening voice.

He shivered, "Do you know what the Chang's are capable of? Much worse things than death."

I gave him my coldest glare; I wasn't playing a game tonight. I wanted answers, "And I'm not?"

He sighed, seeming to be mauling it over, "Look, I wasn't lying when I said what I said about Izumi wasn't a lie. Izumi isn't alive anymore, but she doesn't even know~"

"IZAYA!"

_Shit. _But I guess I should have seen this coming, I had come to Ikebukuro a few times and I hadn't seen him until then.

"Hey, Shizu~" without warning or provocation a vending machine came flying at me. I bent back and avoided it; unfortunately he scared away the nice thug I was talking to.

"How many times have I told you to stay the hell out of Ikebukuro!" he shouted, it really wasn't a question. Before I even had the time to come up with a witty comeback, he was running at me with a street sign. I ran off as fast as my legs could carry me as we began our usual game, but there was a distinct difference this time. As my blood pressure spiked my head throbbed painfully, causing my vision to blur and my steps to become uneven as I ran.

"What's the matter, IZAYA, getting tired?!"

I turned around to respond and maybe tease him a bit, suddenly a yield sign smashed into my side. I cringed, eyes watering but stayed silent, I wasn't about to give this monster the satisfaction of making me scream. I ran backward clutching my side, I'm pretty sure he had broken most if not all of my ribs on that side. My head throbbed, my ribs hurt, my lungs were burning like hell's fire as I sucked in big breaths of frigid air, and I was beginning to see little black dots in the corner of my eyes. If I didn't stop running soon I was going to fall.

"IZAYA!" He swung at me and I avoided, but not without falling back on my heels over the side of the road.

I was going to die.

Before I understood what was happening I was sliding face first down the roadside ditch.

And I knew I wouldn't be here if I hadn't murdered the only person who ever loved me.

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><p><strong>Review for next chapter!<strong>


	11. Chapter 11

**Merry Christmas! I actually added a chapter! One I quite like also a tad twisted, but a little sweet.**

**Like a Christmas Candy cane! (i'm actually not high it's just late ;P)**

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><p>Fallen AngelXFallen monster.<p>

It was early Monday morning as I walked to the school at a leisurely pace, taking my sweet time and in the scenery. The scenery left to be desired, I opined. I walked by the side of the road looking a the trash that stupid, careless human beings had tossed aside. That was the one thing I hated about the most populated places in the world, more people meant more trash. Japan was better than some places but still. So many things people just toss aside.

I let out a visible breath and sighed, it was cold this morning, and if my current condition had any weakness, it was cold, and extreme heat. My body wasn't good at maintaining temperature. Despite this, I recognized it was a better weakness than most, going out in cold and hot weather is avoidable. I could have taken the train. I just decided to be an idiot that morning and walk to school for a time of quiet reflection, my coffee in one hand and my brief case in another.

Though, it was moments later when I became very glad that I had decided to walk. I discovered,

"Izaya?" unconscious in a road side ditch. Taking my things under my arms I slid down the ditch to get to them. There Izaya lay, concealed under the bridge covered in trash and damp with the water from the gutter. I touched his neck, feeling for a pulse. It was faint and a little irregular, but still, he was alive.

I lifted him into my arms, hugging his freezing body against me, "D-don't die, I-Izaya..." I stammered, petting and stroking. Supporting him with one arm I pulled out my cell phone and called the school.

"Hey~" I said in my best sick voice, "I can't * cough * come to work today..." I said, "I'm really si- Oh god!" I made a gagging sound and dumped my coffee on the ground, "Ewe!" and hung up,

I lifted Izaya up again and carried him out of the ditch. I ran back to my apartment as fast as my legs could carry me. For once, I was glad that Tokyo was so over populated, no one really paid me any mind despite who I was carrying.. When I got to my door, I just kicked it down, scaring the hell out of my cat. I laid him down gently on my bed. I knew if he stayed in his clothing he was going to get sick I stripped him down. I touched his bare skin, he was colder than ice and he wasn't shivering. I gave a soft growl, he probably had hypothermia. His body was marked with cuts and bruises and when, out of habit, I reached over and started to stroke his hair (something he usually enjoyed) he whimpered and turned over.

_A concussion on top of this, dammit!_ I thought back to the night I had pinned him down. I bashed his head against a concrete pillar.

I groaned loudly, "It's my fault," I stroked his cheek gently, "I'm sorry sweetheart. I was only trying to stun you, but those brats worsened the damage."

My mind went over the definition and symptoms of hypothermia as I felt his ice cold skin under my fingers. _Hypothermia, a condition in which internal body temperature becomes dangerously low._

_Treatment: remove any dampened clothes immediately._

"Check." I muttered.

_Place hot water bottles on the sides of their neck and between their legs to increase their body temperature. _

"I don't have any hot water bottles."

_If you don't have any hot water bottles a warm body may suffice, however, it is best to get immediate medical attention for all cases of hypothermia._

I looked down at Izaya's frail body laying there.

"You're going to kill me if you wake up but I don't care." I said as I stripped down and laid beside him, pulling him back against me before covering us both with a blanket. He gave a soft mewl in his slumber as I continued to hold him. He was so cold!

I let my fingers gently stroke his ribs, he whimpered, "Broken ribs too?"

I decided I would doctor his wounds after he was warm, left untreated, hypothermia was worse for his health. I held him in the gentlest embrace possible, propping myself up on my elbows as to not put any weight on him. You may have consider this paranoid and unnecessary but I suppose when I look at Izaya I still see the helpless 13 year old boy I met a lifetime ago, I know a lot had changed in him. But … (I closed my eyes) ...I had changed as well.

Despite the bit of discomfort I was in from propping myself up I would have been content to stay like this forever.

I had been holding him for a while, rubbing his belly in small circles when he finally started to shiver a little and nestled a little to get comfortable.

"You really are cute, Izaya."

I couldn't believe it, after everything I still loved him more than anything. This almost felt like a dream, a dream I never wanted to wake up from.

I planted an affectionate kiss on the back of his neck, the sweet smell of Izaya's shampoo tainted with the infatuating smell of blood, "Izaya Orihara, the world's most adorable sociopath."

Izaya gave a soft croon and twitched. Even though I really would have liked to continue to hold him but he was warmer and I couldn't put off doctoring his wounds any longer. I slipped out of the covers and turned up the thermostat so he STAYED warm, I pulled the covers off of him. I examined him closely and routinely but I couldn't help but let me fingers gently run over his skin. Being with Izaya always seemed to intensify my usually dull emotions, whether this was good or bad was up for debate, but still, it was something to take note of.

At the moment I was feeling slightly guilty that in his unconscious state he couldn't cover himself but I quickly shook it away. His health was more important to me than his pride.

He was thinner than I remembered, bruises marked down his nearly visible ribs.

_Broken ribs, if they have been left untreated for a period of time they may require being reset._

I really didn't want to hurt Izaya that bad but I would do it if that's what it took to help him to heal.

Thankfully, all his injuries seemed to be acquired recently enough that no extra pain for the ravenette was required.

_After resetting them, bind the patients chest up (very) tightly with bandages._

I didn't have any bandages (in my current state I didn't really need them) so I tore one of my plain shirts into strips. I used the strips as bandages and wrapped them tightly around my little raven's torso, one after another, tying them at his side. It ad to be tight enough to prevent his ribs from jarring around inside him but be loose enough as to not cause further damage.

My eyebrows furrowed. Balance was always something I struggled with.

I cleaned out and bandaged all other wounds, and having destroyed 4 perfectly good shirts in the process, I admired my handy work before covering him with a blanket.

Now that I had finished with that I went to get my flashlight to check Izaya's pupil dilation.

Once I found it I went over to the bed and spread Izaya's eye open gently and shined it in them. His pupils dilated normally and I nearly collapsed to the ground in relief. That meant he didn't have any serious brain damage.

I kissed him, he was okay. I covered Izaya in a warm blanket and started to pet his head gently. He gave a little smile and I gave a wry one.

How many times had I wished to have Izaya at my mercy?

I gave a little chuckle, _Be careful what you wish for. _That was far as the fantasy got, I couldn't hurt Izaya, not when he was laying there helpless. It would be like kicking a kitten. Or raping a helpless person.

I may have been accused of being all sorts of pervert but I wasn't so low. Izaya may have been mine, but I don't abuse my possessions. I may lose my temper, and I will not be betrayed, but only the weak abuse the helpless.

I sat there, watching him sleep my cat curled up against my uncovered legs and I realized I was still bare. I shrugged it off it wasn't like both Izaya's hadn't seen me naked before.

I know some may find my saying this over and over very annoying, but Izaya was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.

So many people would scoff when I said that, I was the head of one pf the wealthiest if not THE wealthiest family in Japan. I could have anyone I wanted, I could have male models, princes and kings, actors, the people romantic novels were written about, and yet I chose a small, weak, ugly, wiry, emaciated little creature with a mind that matched that I found at a brothel. The act would have infuriated my father if he hadn't thought Izaya was nothing more than my pet.

I suppose they weren't completely wrong but he was what he was because head been pushed that way by people. The humans he said he loved so much turned him into what he was.

People don't want to see that though, humans don't want to have to blame themselves for the so called "dredges" of their society, they would rather just sit above and judge the results. I knew what Izaya really was, the scared child behind that mask, or at least I used to...

I leaned in close to his ear, "I promise I'll take the time to destroy this mask too, Izaya. I'll die to find out what lies beneath if that's what it takes. I've done it once," -I covered his lips with my own- "and I'll do it again."

Izaya groaned and I wondered what he could be dreaming about.

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><p><strong>Review! But be civil, I wish this sight had a delete function sometimes...<strong>


	12. Chapter 12

**Sorry it took me so long to update, I hope the length of the chapter helps to make up. I sort of lost my way with this story for a little while but now I'm back on track I think, I might go in and revise some of the other chapters later... So let me know what you think and if you like the direction.**

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><p><strong>Day dream or nightmare, Part 1<strong>

In my dreams I was gently pulled back against of the chest of my kidnapper- or savior, I wasn't quite sure which at that point. She had killed the guy who was raping me true, but then again she had just killed someone and had Chan rape Arata...

"How long do you think that someone would need to run out of a building, Izaya?" my kidnapper asked me suddenly.

"About a minute, I guess."

She made a small sound as she pulled up her sleeve looking at her watch, the driver gave her a look in the mirror out of the corner of his eye. My kidnapper closed her eyes and gave a very emotionless nod, suddenly the limo sped up briskly.

"I didn't mean to be so merciful, well then..." she said softly.

I was confused for only a moment until I heard a huge explosion behind us. I clapped my hand over my mouth to prevent myself from crying out in shock. I felt her arms tighten around me.

"Relax... bombs are usually a lot more fire then death. I'll be surprised if more than three or four people are killed."

_So she really is just sick_, I thought.

I kept my hand over my mouth as I started to feel laughter welling up in my throat. So, apparently I had been taken out of the fire and delivered to the devil. My laughter started out as just giggling that seemed to concern her then I let go and through my head back and laughed all out.

"So what exactly are you?" I was already picturing my head floating in a jar, might as well have some fun with her first, "A mad scientist? A human trafficker? Do you wallpaper homes with human skin? What? What?" I giggled, "What am I here for?" I knew I sounded insane but I didn't care. I wanted to make her mad, I wanted to add her to the list of my precious little humans and monsters. I wanted to get a big reaction from this monotone teenager.

She only smiled, cupping my cheek, she leaned in, silencing me. Her lips brushed my earlobe with every syllable, "I don't know why I took you." she whispered and then leaned back. "Honestly, I absolutely hate human beings... I've never been the type to crave their companionship.. And I really have no use for a prostitute, I'm the CEO of a talent agency," she looked up thoughtfully, "so I can pretty much get sex whenever I could possibly want it. I'll let you know when I do." she stroked my hair gently. "I know you won't believe me, but you're safe..."

I batted her hands away, "If I'm safe, then keep your hands off of me." I pulled out of her lap to look out the window, she sighed.

She pulled out a gold tube of lipstick, applying it to her lips, "Well, you're going to be trouble, aren't you?"

I laughed, "You have no idea-"

She kissed me hard, the corners of my eyes went dark and my body went numb. I went limp, falling against her.

"I won't hurt you, Izaya." was the last thing I heard.

The next thing I knew my body was gently being rocked. My eyes cracked open and I saw the face of my kidnapper above me, the rocking that I felt was her carrying me into a very daunting skyscraper the character for the surname Chang proudly displayed on the top. Beside her was the short, blonde limo driver. I decided it was to my best interest to pretend to still be asleep.

"Jiseki, once were inside take him to my apartment... He needs to be washed and clothed. Do so quickly and if he is still asleep place him on my bed... That should be all."

"Yes, ma'am," the small male said.

Suddenly, the walking stopped, I felt her hand me over to the small male. He started to walk

"Oh, and jiseki..." the girl's voice said, causing the boy to stop, "If you tell anyone that he's here, I'll tear your throat out."

"Yes, ma'am."

"That includes my father." she added without mirth.

I felt the male swallow, "Of course, ma'am, as you wish." He started walking again, dragging me with him. I felt him struggle into a service elevator. I smiled, so we were finally alone. I seized the chance I had been given, grabbing him to pull out of his hand bashing his face against the side of the elevator. He fell back and I smiled. I took his clothing, laying the jacket my kidnapper had given me over him. I gave him a little two finger salute before stepping out of the opening elevator doors. I looked around, the elevator opened right by the stairs. I went up the stair well, I was nine floors under the ground floor and just walking made my insides burn horribly. I clutched the railing, breathing deeply as I went up the steps. When I finally reached the ground floor I pressed my ear to the door. There was silence outside it so I hesitantly turned the nob and peeked out. No one was around so I stepped out, sliding around the corner when I heard voices. I pressed my back to the wall and the walked right pass where I was hiding. I sighed with relief as stepped out again, slipping out of the hall into the large reception area. I heard my kidnapper, distracted by the receptionist.

"I told you not to accept any meetings," she growled.

Then the frightened receptionist, "I know Chang-san, but you know I can't very well stop him-"

I was about to slip out the door when someone walked in, the glass door slamming in my face and pushing me back to the floor, the sound alerted everyone in the room. The man in the doorway laughed.

"Well, you've really let this place go to the dogs, haven't you Izumi," he directed his eyes up towards my kidnapper, Izumi apparently.

She walked up to him, her face expressionless, "Well, hello father," she bowed, "to what do I owe your surprise visit?" she glanced at me out of the corner of her eye, they narrowed momentarily before she looked back at her father.

"Arata's business was blown up by a terrorist about an hour, killed six, including the local congressman." he said.

Izumi voice bore no guilt nor any joy when she said, "What a shame."

The man smiled, "Who's this?" he looked at me.

Izumi stepped in front of his line of sight, "No one, absolutely no one." she said.

"Please, Izumi, there's no need to act so childish." he pushed her to the side with a rough hand.

He looked at me for a second, covering my eye with my hand where the door had slammed into my face, he closed his eyes, "He's a whore, isn't he?"

Izumi just looked down at the floor.

"Let's take this down stairs, shall we?" he gestured her into the opening elevator, "And don't forget your new special friend." he chuckled a little. Izumi only glared, she grabbed me by my collar and jerked me up so I was standing. She said nothing, but there was death in her eyes when guided me into the elevator. Everything was totally silent until we all stepped out on floor -9.

"Shove that thing somewhere and sit down." Izumi's father growled out. She nodded, sitting me down with a look like 'move and you're dead' before going into the other room closing the screen behind her so only their shadows were visible. But I could still hear everything, starting off with a resounding slap to Izumi's face.

"You have ten minutes to explain."

"I have nothing I need to explain," Izumi choked out in response. Another slap, louder than the first, "I picked up a pet on my way back, nothing less nothing more," she added, "even you can't reject that, not with your history."

"If you wanted someone to play with what do you think I'm here for," his tone turned into a voice that a father should never use when talking to his daughter, "Suki..." the sound of a door shutting.. Then complete silence.

About a half an hour later Izumi came into the room, her clothes disheveled and torn in some places, she still bore a red mark on her face from being slapped. "It's nice to know you didn't try to run off again." she said dully, closing the screen door behind her. She came up to me and grabbed my hair, jerking my head back. I clamped my eyes shut waiting to be punched, smacked, thrown...something.

"Let's see how bad the damage is," she said gently, she pulled my head to the side to get a better look at the side of my face that had been damaged, "Can you open your eyes." it was more an order than a question. I opened them to see her face, no anger, no sadness nothing. She looked like a mechanic looking at a broken air-conditioner. "The swelling's not that bad yet, but you still need ice." she went over to the refrigerator opened it and tossed me an icepack, "Hold that on your bruise, I'm going to start a bath." I held the pack to my eye, wincing slightly as it put pressure on the sensitive flesh. About a minute later Izumi came back, rubbing her hands dry with a towel.

"Alright, the bath is ready, take off jiseki's clothing," I must have given her a look, because she scoffed, "It's not like I haven't already seen everything you've got."

I started to undress, taking of the jacket then the shirt, I was about to take the pants when I noticed she was still watching. I chuckled, "If you're looking for a show, I'm not the whore you should have picked."

"Wow," she said, I smiled, hoping to have finally struck a nerve, "you can't hide all your insecurities with snide, you know."

I grimaced, pulling down the pants as she looked away. I smirked, "And you know you can't hide incest with cloth screen, right?"

For a second she stopped, "That will be a good thing to know if I am ever put into that situation."she said before continuing to walk away.

I frowned, I didn't like this, not one bit. Humans were predictable, when you lash out, they lash back. When you undermine humans in power, the punish or silence you completely. Humans are silly and are easily read... You can always tell what a human thinks or feels. Humans like other humans... Humans always take the bate I lay out... Humans feel satisfaction... And a million other things ran through my mind as I undressed. Izumi was none of those things. I shook my head rapidly, that wasn't possible, it was like an ape that had been taught how to use manners... that didn't make it any less of an ape.

"Are you going to bathe or just stain my couch?" I heard her ask from the other room. I walked in to another part of the apartment, blocked off by a screen, seeing a huge round tub filled near the brim with hot water and bubbles. I stepped in, the hot water hitting my bruises and making me wince.

"The towel and clothes are on the right, but I want to get a good look at you before you get dressed, see if there are any problems. Let me know if you need any help." she started to walk away.

"I don't understand why I have to be naked for a check-up." I remarked with a smug smile.

"You're the type that hides your bruises... You don't like appearing weak to others." she said matter-of-factly, as it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"You don't know anything about me," I said, a little annoyed but trying to keep it out of my tone.

"I know everything there is to know about you, Orihara Izaya."

My eyes widened momentarily, then I shook my head, "So what, you looked me up and found my surname, that's hardly impressive."

"I know you come from Ikebukuro, you have two sisters, twins... but there's so much more to you than that, isn't there?" she said darkly. "Your parents had nothing, so they decided that you would be their legacy. They wanted nothing less than for you to be a god among humans... an immortal soul, a messiah, and nothing else was acceptable. You weren't allowed to cry as a child, or even show any wounds or bruises to anyone, ever... You weren't allowed to express sadness, and anger was highly frowned upon because that meant you were letting petty human problems get to you. So you learned that the easiest thing to do was turn every emotion you feel into snark, fear especially. That's why you're being such a brat now. I saw you cry, I saw you afraid and now I'm not acting like all the other people who saw you that way, and it's driving you nuts."

I froze, my eyes widened. There was no way, there was no way that she could guess any of that. She took my hand and helped me out of the tub, looking me over, just like she said.

"I didn't guess," she said, sounding almost insulted, "I can read your mind." she gave me a small smile, "I thought about continuing into how you wound up with Arata... but you and I both know that you still don't want to go home just yet, even if you don't want to admit it. Honestly, you have no idea what you would do if you actually managed to escape this place. You can leave whenever you like," she placed something in one of my hands, I brought it to my face and looked it over, it was a simple flip pocket knife, she pressed up against me, putting her chin on my shoulder and whispered, "but you'll have to kill me."

I chuckled, "So you really are just nuts, you know I could just kill you now."

She made a small sound, I could feel her smiling, "I honestly believe I have nothing to worry about."

She was right and we both knew it, no matter how bad things get there's a part of me that loves every bit of it, the ride, the fear, the part that made me burst out laughing underneath clients and smile at Arata when he beat me, very few people could actually make me afraid. I was never afraid of humans, only monsters... Like Diachi... the congressman who constantly threatened me.. My most _affectionate _client, and I didn't want to die. Even a human could scare me if they could make good on a threat of death. Izumi had that quality, that was easy to see, but for some reason if was the sort of fear that she triggered in me infatuated me.. enthralled me.

"I wouldn't say that," was the only response I could give.

She chuckled, "Get dressed, I need to get some bandages for your eye." she slipped away from me. I eyed the knife again, flipping it up to see if it were real, sure enough there was a shiny metal blade, "I bet it's so dull you couldn't even use it to cut paper." I ran the tip of my finger over the blade, feeling it cut through the skin, I looked to see a drop of blood coming from the tip of my finger. I stared at the crimson fluid in awe for a second before I heard her voice again, I quickly grabbed the clothes she set out for me and pulled them on.

"So I take it you like the knife. Sit." I sat down on the floor without even thinking about it, she dipped a bandage in peroxide and pressed it to my head.

"I don't understand, it's sharp..." I said softly.

"I know," she said, finishing with my eye to bandage my arm, "the question is why don't you use it?" she took my hand in hers, rubbing my knuckles with her thumb gently.

I smiled, then used the knife to stab her, in her arm deeply. I expected a scream, a wince some expression of pain other than the blood that quickly began to soak her arm. But she only smiled, as if I had presented her with some sort of rare gift.

"We both know that that's not good enough, Izaya." she pressed her lips into mine and my body went limp, "You need to get some rest, but my offer still stands. Kill me and you're free." she let me go, and I felt myself fall forward into an uncomfortable position on the floor. I couldn't even move my head, I looked at her out of the corner of my eye, "I knew you couldn't do it, because I can read your mind, and you want to know exactly how this turns out... Even if it's horrible, you need to know everything there is to know about people." and I slipped into unconsciousness.

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><p><strong>And you thought she was off as an adult, well I hope this chapter explains some more about their relationship.. and who Izumi is as a person. Please review! Review if you want to know what happens next!<strong>


	13. Chapter 13

Sorry its taken me so long to update, blame my teachers!

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><p>(Izaya dream P.O.V.)<p>

I was a thirteen year old child when I woke up for the first time I woke up in that pristine white bedroom, on the bed that normally held one such lonely teenager, a bed that could easily fit six. The memories of falling onto the carpet came back to me, of being kissed for the sole purpose of knocking me unconscious for the second time... well, maybe not sole purpose. With that thought I sat up with a jolt and jerked the sheet back. I expected to be naked, maybe even tied to the bed in some way I hadn't noticed, I sighed deeply. I was fully clothed and free. I guess I should have been grateful, but I was honestly a little annoyed. I only knew a couple of things that were actually worth drugging someone over, and only one that actually ended with the person alive.

"Is it too much to ask for a little predictability?" I wondered to no one in particular, falling back on the bed. I heard the sound of the elevator opening and decided it was time for me to get up, I peeked around a corner to see Izumi sitting on the couch and her jiseki coming in, "Chang-san, the kid, he-"

"It's already been taken care of." Izumi said between slurps of ramen noodles.

"He's still here!" her jiseki shouted in surprise, "That child is a menace! He _attacked_ me and _stole_ my clothes."

"I am very well aware of what he has done, jiseki," she said dully, "my father was here."

The jiseki stared at her, eyes wide, "And he's still alive?"

"My father has his price." she sighed, referencing such a sick act as commonplace.

"I can't even comprehend why you would do that, the kid obviously doesn't even want to be here."

"He doesn't want to leave either, the kid likes being in danger, I think he gets off on it. "

"Sounds a bit unstable."

Izumi's face twirked into something like a smile, "I don't know, I like him, he's very disrespectful to me."

"You say that as if it were a good thing," said jiseki.

"It's certainly more entertaining then what I'm used to."

"You've killed people for being insolent before," said jiseki.

"This is different," she touched the gouge in her arm, "normally people treat me with no respect because they consider themselves in a position of power above me, Izaya is an injured prostitute I saved from spending the rest of his life in a brothel... I could kill him... I could tear him apart any time I wanted," she smiled then, the emotion in her wide blue eyes completely unreadable, "his entire existence sits in my hands..." she laughed softly.

"It's not right, sir, every _sane_ person will always bend to you... it's just human nature."

Izumi looked down, the light reflecting in her silver sunglasses, "It's the very nature of humanity I hate." she looked away for a second, "I don't know, maybe keeping him around will cause this feeling to wear off, but for now, no one is touch him, no matter the price."

"And when it does, I mean it's not like you can just let him back into the general population."

She gave a smile then, a small, unnatural smile as she straightening her sunglasses, "Yeah, speaking of which," she stood up and got in front of her jiseki, it happened in a second, she raised her leg and slammed him down the floor, standing on his hands, "why were you so foolish as to let him overpower you?'

The younger slowly and feebly raised his head, looking up at her submissively, "I didn't do it on purpose sir," he said weakly.

"Intentions are immaterial," she said, her voice hard and unforgiving, "I gave you a simple task that you didn't complete, that's all that matters." she shifted he foot slightly; her jiseki winced. My eyes widened at the next thing she said.

"Give me one reason why I shouldn't break them."

Her jiseki looked up, his back and shoulders visibly cramping from the awkward position, "Excuse me sir?"

"You have 60 seconds to give me one reason why I shouldn't break your hands." her voice was so cold it was almost robotic, the only part of her face that seemed to move at all were her lips. Her eyes staring down at him in fixated disdain.

"Please, sir... I need my hands."

There was a dark sparkle over Izumi's sunglasses when she said, "That's not a reason."

"Please, sir," he grumbled pathetically, keeping his eyes downcast in traditional respect, "I didn't mean to let him go. It was an accident, I swear. I have always done just as you say down to the letter, I have been obedient and loyal-" Izumi moved her foot slightly, causing him to cry out in pain.

"Not good enough."

"Please, sir... I'm sorry... I'll do anything to make it up to you."

I watched as Izumi sighed and reached into her coat, pulling out a clean white handgun, her jiseki laid his head down and sobbed. She stood there, rubbing a shine into the gun with her coat.

"Do you know what would happen if I shot you, jiseki?" she asked casually, as if she were talking about the weather, "Another one just like you would take your place, if I killed him another one would come and so on and so forth..." she murmured thoughtfully, "There isn't a single soul on this earth that can't be replaced." during the entirety of her speech her jiseki hadn't raised his head of the floor. He lay there, obviously expecting Izumi's to be the last voice he would ever hear. Izumi stepped off his hands and sighed, "So don't screw up again." she said without looking at him.

The young jiseki raised his face from the carpet, there were tears on his face and his nose was running, "A-again?" he immediately prostrated himself, "Thank you! Thank you!" he said, rocking back and forth as if in the presence of a god.

For the first time I'd seen, Izumi's shoulder's were shaking with anger. She spun around, eyes blazing, "GET OUT!" she screamed at the small male, he picked himself up and ran out of the room, Izumi face softened back into expressionless as she flopped back down onto the couch. "You can come in any time you want, Izaya."

I wandered out of the room, steadying my tired body against the textured white walls, "How long have you known I was awake?"

"Since you muttered something about predictability." she pulled off her glasses and rubbed her eye gently, "I'm sorry, I'd forgotten how lonely that room can feel when you're young.

"Pardon me," she continued, replacing her glasses with a blank expression, "did you sleep well?"

"Very well," I said with crossing the room so I was standing behind the couch she was sitting in, and leaning forward on my elbows whispered, "but I guess that just shows the effectiveness of chloroform." in her ear with a smug smirk. She looked back at me with a glint in her glasses and before I had time to pull away, she grabbed me by the arm and in one swift motion pulled me over and onto the couch beside her, only upside down so my head dangled slightly off the edge.

She pulled away and not looking at me she explained, "I didn't want you to have nightmares."

Her explanation left me genuinely startled, I pulled myself up onto the couch and sitting on my calves so we were at eye-level I stared at her, her expression caught between bored and subtle melancholy, I leaned forward slightly and found myself toppling stupidly into her lap.

She grabbed me and gently pulled me back up so I was sitting, "Sorry, your rather lithe so chloroform has more lasting effects." she apologized.

I sighed tiredly and closed my eyes, my mind beginning to race slightly as the events of the last day and a half crossed my mind, "Who are you? Wh-what are you?"

"I am Izumi Chang," she stated simply as if that explained everything, she gently grabbed my chin and pulled me to look at her, "For now that's all you need to know." our eyes met for a long time, as if the first to look away would be revealing some unknown weakness, suddenly, her lips were on my neck and her thumb was caressing my cheek. I shifted uncomfortably, pulling away from her, her other arm quickly curled itself to the small of my back, effectively putting an end to that. I squirmed as I felt her tongue poke out during one of the kisses.

"I-Izumi..." I stammered out, my voice halfway between scared and breathless, I could feel myself become flushed. I'd been touched before, but not like this, when people touched me they were taking something away from me... It didn't feel like that, it felt like she was searching for something, something deep inside me, and I was scared. Her hand moved from my face to slide under the thin black cotton of my t-shirt, slightly cold it made me gasp. Slowly, her hand slid up and down over the center of my chest, stopping over my heart and just staying there. I knew she could feel my heart racing, and that scared me too.

"The human heart is such a fragile thing..." she said softly, "It can be broken with a single word... such silly ideas.. " she murmured nonsense, her fingers tapping gently across the center of my chest like the limbs of a spider.

It felt nice and wrong at the same time, my chest twisted not completely uncomfortably. Her tongue poked out gently over a scar near my collar bone, I whimpered and felt my own body tighten. The whole thing felt surreal, and for the first time I could remember there was a part of me that wanted to close my eyes, relax in her arms and let it happen. Whatever "this", whatever "it" was. It couldn't cause to much harm.

But it could, I had almost forgotten how I had gotten that scar. Daichi was moving on top of me, demanding I give him something, to fight him or love him and when I refused he wrapped his hands around my neck and started to choke me. I started laughing, my chest constricting painfully as tears refused to stop flowing. He asked me if I thought my situation was funny, and when I continued to laugh grabbed the pen off the bedside table and told me he would silence me forever. I assume his plan was simply to puncture my voice box, judging by the angle which he stabbed my throat. I probably would have bled to death if Arata hadn't heard my screams become quiet ad given Daichi a warning about damaging the merchandise.

If I let her manipulate me I'd be the little whore I was always accused of being. I squished my arms between our bodies and shoved her with all my strength, kicking and twisting. She didn't budge, "St-stop!"

Suddenly, she just let go, my body slamming down onto the couch, I stared at her as she pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose, not looking at me.

"Sorry, I should have guessed you were ticklish," she said.

My eyes widened, did she really think that was the problem?

She chuckled, looking at me over her glasses, "I'm kidding, I said I wouldn't hurt you and I won't."

I said nothing, just attempted to rub the feeling of her lips off my neck.

"You want something to eat?" she asked, sliding off the couch.

"No thanks," as if just to spite me, my stomach gurgled.

"You like ootoro, right?"

I nodded.

(Izumi P.O.V.)

I gently caressed his cheek and pulled away, I smiled as one of his hands came up to gently rub the touch away. _Ticklish._

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